May You Bloom and Grow Forever
I never expected to be undone in the middle of a theatrical production of The Sound of Music, but I was. I tell this story in today’s podcast, Unmanipulatable, but I wanted to share it here as well for those who might miss it there.
Last Saturday, Sara and I went to see this musical because it is one of Sara’s favorite stories, and she adores the music. I went because we’re exploring things that bring Sara joy. Three years into our marriage we bought our first video cassette recorder and the first movie we bought was Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music. For the next few weeks, I’d arrive home just as the nun was singing Climb Every Mountain. So, that became a bit of a joke in our home, as I would mockingly belt it out with her.
But when it came up in the play, it took me back to those first years Sara and I lived alone as a young couple in love. It made me smile as I watched her enjoy the play. But then, later in the play, Captain Von Trapp sang Edelweiss, which I’ve mistakenly seen as one of the schmaltzier tunes in the show. A few lines in, I was overcome with emotion as tears pooled in my eyes. What just happened? It was the line, “May you bloom and grow, bloom and grow forever.” My body had recognized it before my mind had registered it. I wasn’t thinking about a small white flower in the Alps but my wife sitting beside me.
If you have followed our story, you know the last fifteen years have been quite an adventure for her as she wrestled with a deep pain she didn’t understand, and battled with it for her very life, and finally in the last two years discovered in long-forgotten memories a series of horrific events in her childhood that had traumatized her severely. I am so proud of the way she has embraced her story, even the darkest parts, has leaned into Jesus to find healing from the pain, and is learning to renew her mind with new neural pathways based on who she is, not on how trauma defined her.
As remarkable a story as this is, it has, at times, been an incredibly painful journey for Sara. Last month brought a particularly excruciating memory that hit Sara hard. Dealing with it has been exhausting, and it’s made us wonder how many more may come in years ahead. She was just finding her pace beyond it last week when we went to the play. Watching her enjoy it was particularly meaningful. That’s why my mind was on her when the lyric was sung. Sara will bloom and grow forever. No matter how long this takes her, no matter what dark bridges we have yet to cross, the day will come when the trajectory will shift from working through the pain of the past to embracing his ever-unfolding glory uninterrupted in the present. Yes, that is already happening as we experience the first-fruits of Sara’s growing freedom, but someday, further in this life or perhaps in the next, the pain will all be gone and she can bloom and grow forever in God’s garden. The thought still causes my heart to exult today, and gives me a slightly different view of what eternity might mean for her.
You also know my wife loves gardens, and they’ve been an important part of our story. Today, we will be shooting a video to share with you her current creation, which surrounds our new home. She says this is her favorite garden. I sat in it last week with a good friend, and as we talked numerous butterflies and birds flitted about the flowers. Finally, he remarked, “This seems like a fairy-tale garden in a Disney cartoon.” And it does! That’s a shot of the front of it above, but there is so much more. Thinking of her blooming for eternity is a joy all its own. I know Jesus already sees her as the beautiful flower he made her to be, but she will get to become more aware of it.
And not just her, me too! And not just us, but you, too. No matter what pain and struggle you’re working out in your life, the day will come, perhaps sooner than any of us think, when sorrow will yield to celebration, pain will be absorbed in healing, and death will give way to life. From there, we will all get to bloom and grow forever in the presence of Jesus, where each one of us will get to be all that Jesus created it to be before the fallenness of the world disfigured us.
That’s redemption! As I watched the end of the play, I Corinthians 15:42-44 (Message), kept creeping into my mind:
“This image of planting a dead seed and raising a live plant is a mere sketch at best, but perhaps it will help in approaching the mystery of the resurrection body—but only if you keep in mind that when we’re raised, we’re raised for good, alive forever! The corpse that’s planted is no beauty, but when it’s raised, it’s glorious. Put in the ground weak, it comes up powerful. The seed sown is natural; the seed grown is supernatural—same seed, same body, but what a difference from when it goes down in physical mortality to when it is raised up in spiritual immortality!
So, my prayer for you today, is that you will rest confident in knowing that the work of Jesus in you now means that you too will get to bloom and grow forever. Your Father already sees you as a treasured delight in his garden but when the struggle is over you will see it, too, and revel in it and him forever.
Even so, Lord Jesus, come quickly!