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“A Tender, Urgent, Spirit-infused Call”

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First, I want to thank all of you who helped us save the petrol station in Kenya, which supports impoverished families near Kitale. As of last Friday, we were short almost $5,000 from reaching our goal. Someone called that morning and wanted to provide whatever we still needed. So, we had all we needed to help our friends. You have so often amazed me with your generosity, and it spills over into great thanksgiving to God for how he has helped us time and time again intervene on their behalf.

Additionally, I would like to share with you a review I received from Citi of Books regarding my new book, It’s Time: Letters to the Bride of Christ at the End of the Age. They have captured the heart in both the content and spirit of what I wanted this book to convey. For someone not associated with my book or familiar with what I do at Lifestream and TheGodJourney, I’m blown away by their gracious words:

Wayne Jacobsen’s It’s Time! is a tender, urgent, and Spirit-infused call to the heart of every believer who dares to ask: What if Jesus is coming back sooner than we think—and are we living like it matters? In this moving collection of spiritual letters, Jacobsen writes not with fear or fanaticism, but with deep love and prophetic insight—guiding Christ’s followers into readiness not just for His return, but for the kind of radiant, resilient faith needed in these final hours.

Drawing from the imagery of the Bride of Christ, Jacobsen paints a portrait of a people set apart—longing not for escape, but for intimacy with the Bridegroom. His tone is pastoral and poetic, rooted in Scripture and overflowing with wisdom born of experience and prayer. As he walks the hills near his home and listens to the whisper of the Spirit, he passes on that whisper to us—reminding us of what it means to live faithfully in an age clouded by darkness and deception.

This is not apocalyptic speculation. It’s spiritual preparation. With honesty and clarity, Jacobsen reminds us that whether Christ returns in 10 years or 150, there must always be a generation willing to:

  • Love beyond self-preservation
  • Shine brighter than the lies of the age
  • Walk in unshakable trust amid the shaking of nations
  • Anchor hope not in outcomes, but in God’s sovereign story

What makes It’s Time! so compelling is that it doesn’t scream for attention—it sings. It calls quietly, yet powerfully, to the Bride of Christ to awaken, to prepare, and to live as though eternity is nearer than we think.

Wayne Jacobsen has given the global Church a gift: a love letter from heaven echoed through the voice of a faithful servant. It’s Time! is not just about eschatology—it’s about transformation. It’s about what kind of people we’re becoming as we wait, watch, and witness. Whether you’re weary, wondering, or wide awake, this book will call you higher—to readiness, to holiness, and to Jesus.

Don’t just read it. Respond to it.

Because maybe… it really is time.

Wow! I am so grateful.

I’m currently writing the final chapter of Part 2, and then the book will be available in its entirety.  If you don’t have your copy of Part 1, you can order it from Amazon on Kindle or in paperback. The ebook is only $4.99, and the paperback is $7.99.

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We Are About Half Way There

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Last week, I asked if you could help my friends in Kenya once again. They are about to lose the petrol station we built for them at a government auction due to nonpayment of fees they were unaware they owed. The profits from this station support an orphanage and education center, as well as help their graduating students find their way in life. It has been in operation for over fifteen years.

Thanks to your generosity, we’ve received almost $9900.00 of the $22,328 in a few days. I’m so grateful to those of you who felt inspired to help us here. We have to send the money at the end of this week to prevent the auction and restore the petrol station to our brothers and sisters in Kenya.

So, in case there are others still considering this, I thought I’d ask one last time. If you can help us raise the remaining funds, please visit our Donation Page at Lifestream. Please designate “Kenya” in the Note section of your donation, or email us to let us know that your gift is intended for Kenya. You can also Venmo contributions to “@LifestreamMinistries” or mail a check to Lifestream Ministries  •  1560 Newbury Rd Ste 1  •  Newbury Park, CA 91320. Or, if you prefer, we can take your donation over the phone at (805) 498-7774.

As always, every dime you send will end up in Kenya. We do not take out any money for administrative overhead.

Thank you for your concern and prayers for these people in Kenya.

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Once Again, Help for Kenya

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Sara and I are back from our anniversary celebration in Alaska. We saw such immense beauty and thoroughly enjoyed our ten days together exploring this rich land. We saw some fantastic scenery and had some rich conversations reflecting on our journey together. We arrived home Sunday and are getting back at it around here. For those near Boise, ID, or anyone who would like to join me there, I’ll be gathering with some people there the weekend of June 27-29.  You can get details here.

Also, I need to ask for your help again. Seventeen years ago, we built an orphanage to help children whose parents were killed in the tribal violence that swept that part of Kenya after a disputed election. I had traveled there to help a group of people explore what it means to live in the Father’s affection.  We met with these children, who were living in a slum, and helped them procure land and build a better place for them to grow up.  To help fund the ongoing needs of those children, we also built a petrol station nearby, whose profits would support the combination orphanage and school. It has worked well all these years, and now the profits from the petrol station are helping them begin their adult lives.  Here’s what Michael wrote me about it:

The project has been a great blessing to hundreds of families, especially through food contributions and house rent for some families, and many are still landless. Their future is in the hands of God, and through a monthly distribution from the station. Many families are living under oppression. We provide food, medication, and even buy their burial place when needed.  We believe that in the future, we will ask our well-wishers and friends to help purchase the land and build houses and toilets, so that they can stay permanently. This will help them move out of homelessness and get a place.

We are discovering that crisis is a way of life in Kenya. Last week, they discovered that they had not been paying a required tax on the petrol station. They were unaware of the tax, and the county had not been enforcing it. Due to the country’s economic needs, the government decided to crack down on numerous businesses, requiring them to pay taxes or risk losing their licenses.  Many were fined $50,000 to $100,000, so they are blessed to only owe $22,000. The station has been closed by the government and will be auctioned off in two weeks if the debt is not settled. They need $22,328 to rescue the business and keep the orphanage and school functioning.

Would you please help us help them?  We are trying to raise those funds by early next week to get it transferred in time. If you can help us raise this $22,328 to restore the petrol station, please see our Donation Page at Lifestream. Please designate “Kenya” in the Note section of your donation, or email us to let us know that your gift is intended for Kenya. You can also Venmo contributions to “@LifestreamMinistries” or mail a check to Lifestream Ministries • 1560 Newbury Rd Ste 1  •  Newbury Park, CA 91320. Or, if you prefer, we can take your donation over the phone at (805) 498-7774.

As always, every dime you send will end up in Kenya. We do not take out any money for administrative overhead.

Thank you for your concern and prayers for these people in Kenya.

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Fifty Years of Wonder

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Sara and I were married on May 17, 1975. Tomorrow, we will celebrate fifty years together, and we both feel incredibly grateful not only for the gift the other has been to us but also for God’s help in navigating the last fifty years together to greater freedom and wholeheartedness.

I used to think fifty years of marriage was an achievement, but now I know it is a gift. We have dear friends whose spouses died at younger ages, and people very close to us whose marriages ended in painful divorces. It’s always a tragedy when a marriage comes to an end, even a bad one. The promise of love got swallowed up in someone’s selfishness, trauma, or abuse. No one sees it coming on the day they get married, and none of them are less worthy of happiness than Sara and I. I take comfort in knowing that God has other ways to fulfill their joy.

Sara has always been the most fantastic wife, lover, and friend. She has brought so much joy, wisdom, and beauty into my life. I will be forever grateful for the day God brought us together and how he has walked with us through the years. We know that two flawed people got married fifty years ago, and learning to love each other more deeply continues to change us for the better.

Yesterday, we flew to Alaska for a brief land tour before boarding a cruise down the coast to Vancouver. This morning, we began a two-part podcast in which Kyle asks me provocative questions about how Sara and I have navigated this journey. We talk about the amazing wisdom God had in putting two people together for life, and how learning to love another person so closely is the training ground for discovering the power of love. Other than that, things will be quiet on my websites for the next ten days or so.

Recently, Sara and I have been sorting through pictures from our life together. We’ve had so many amazing moments with each other, our kids and grandkids, and the friendships and travel opportunities we’ve enjoyed. We have lots to celebrate and live every day in immense gratitude for all we have shared.

We’ve also had our tough times, to be sure. You don’t get through fifty years without traversing deep valleys because of tragic circumstances or struggling to communicate past differing points of view. Eventually, we would find our way to unity again and be able to continue with our love growing deeper.

So, these days, we are grateful for God’s work in each of us individually and in our lives together. Without him, we wouldn’t have made it this far. We look forward to the adventures still to come, ever more in love today than all the days before.

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Chapter 19: Children of the Day 

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Note: This is the nineteenth in a series of letters written for those living at the end of the age, whenever that comes in the next fifteen years or the next one hundred and fifty years. We have already released the first part of this book in print. You can also access the previous chapters here.  If you are not already subscribed to this blog and want to ensure you don’t miss any of them, you can add your name here.

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How can you write with such conviction about these things when you hold to a point of view a lot of other Christians don’t share? Don’t get me wrong, my heart is in sync with almost everything you’ve written, but I’m always second-guessing myself because I know so few people who see it the way I do. 

Marcellus, basketball coach and father of two in Virginia

Marcellus, 

First, if I had followed the Christian crowd throughout my life, I wouldn’t know Jesus the way I know him today. I didn’t start out to be a nonconformist. In my early days, I could work Christianity as well as anyone, and I so much wanted its affirmation. But the choices I was presented with kept knocking me off that path, either because I couldn’t compromise something I knew to be true or because Jesus invited me in a different direction.

That used to frustrate me. Why couldn’t I fit in like everyone else? It wasn’t because I thought I was wiser; I just could not do otherwise. I love that you second-guess yourself if that doesn’t overwhelm you or dissuade you from following him. Humility, as I wrote about earlier, is a gift, especially when we recognize that we only see in part. I hope this book encourages people like you to follow their heart without the arrogance of thinking they have all the answers. There’s much I don’t see and don’t know, but I try to follow where he leads. 

At the same time, I don’t mind expressing what I see as honestly as I can and entrusting it to the reader to discern what is true. I know many will reject much of this book, but I am not trying to convince people who are locked into Christianity as a religion, but rather to encourage those who seek a more authentic faith in Jesus than what it can sustain.  

Jesus warned us that the broad road leads to destruction; only the narrow path leads to life. I can’t help it if few people want to follow it. Twelve men went into Canaan to spy out the land, but only two thought God big enough to give it to them. No one would face the giant Goliath, except David, the shepherd boy. Jesus miraculously fed five thousand people, who abandoned him the next day when he spoke words they didn’t understand. At the end of his ministry, Paul said that “all in Asia” had deserted him, including some of the New Testament’s key congregations. 

What it takes to embrace genuine life doesn’t seem to sustain crowds. Even Jesus wondered if he would still find faith on the earth when he returned (Luke 18:8). Resisting the darkness to keep our faith in him is challenging for any of us. It is not easy to deviate from the crowd and suffer the judgments of others. Because we mistakenly measure success in this kingdom by crowd size, book sales, or Internet followers, the temptation to distort the life of Jesus for popularity and money is ever-present, and the person succumbing to it can convince himself that God is leading them.  

Whenever the person of Jesus is displaced at the center of our faith so that we follow a program or agenda in his place, we are on a road to disaster. That’s why finding our affirmation in the acclaim of the masses won’t draw us more deeply into him. Following him in whatever he reveals to you is not a matter of thinking you’re better or wiser than others; it is simply being genuine with the light you see. That will serve you well in the days to come. 

 

Children of the Light

Paul warned us that the Day of the Lord would come as a thief in the night, taking many by surprise. “While people are saying, ‘Peace and security,’ destruction will come upon them suddenly, like labor pains on a pregnant woman, and they will not escape.” (I Thessalonians 5:1-3)

Those are ominous words and have been used to terrify many in Christianity’s relentless strategy to manipulate people’s fears. But Paul didn’t stop there: “But you are not in the darkness so that this day should overtake you like a thief. For you are all sons of the light and sons of the day; we do not belong to the night or to the darkness…. He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with Him. Therefore encourage and build one another up, just as you are already doing.” (I Thess 5:4-5, 10-11)

“Live together with him” is such a beautiful phrase. That’s the theme of this book. We get to live with him no matter what comes, and he will take care of us. While we live in a time of great darkness, we don’t belong to it. We are children of the day. Our hope is firmly staked in a kingdom that embraces a reality far beyond this age. 

The kingdom doesn’t come by human strategy and cannot be fulfilled by our religious institutions. Jesus didn’t give his followers an organization to protect, but his Spirit to follow. Yet, on the day he ascended, they were still looking for him to take control of the world on Israel’s behalf. If not now, when? His answer invited them to look in a different direction. “It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority.” (Acts 1:7)

Those preoccupied with prophecies and dates are looking at the wrong horizon—where the sun sets, not where it rises. Children of the day have their eyes fixed on a different dimension where the kingdom of God thrives. Though it hasn’t yet come in its fullness, that is still their primary citizenship, and they are loyal to that kingdom above all else.

Instead of looking for political fulfillment, Jesus told them to wait! And wait they did, until the Spirit came upon them. They learned at the outset that God didn’t need them to bring the kingdom, but only respond when he does. What amazes me about the book of Acts is that nothing happened by their strategic planning or prayer meetings. Filled with the Spirit, they responded to what Jesus was doing around them. That’s what it means to live as children of the light. 

Peter and John weren’t looking to heal a lame beggar at the temple; the opportunity crossed their path, and they were ready to respond. Afterwards, they weren’t tempted to start a supernatural ministry school to train others to repeat what they had done as a new evangelism strategy.  

It wasn’t Peter’s idea to take the Gospel to Gentiles. God set up the circumstances through dreams and visions that Peter willingly followed, even beyond his prejudices. When the Spirit fell on them, Peter recognized that God had incorporated them into his kingdom. Then he had to come back and explain it to his fellow Jews, who were appalled at the story they heard. 

Paul’s journeys did not result from structured itineraries, but from his willingness to follow the Spirit along the way. Everything helped shape that journey, from avoiding persecution to dreams that changed his plans. He even found passage to Rome as a prisoner, falsely accused by the religious leaders in Jerusalem, who had hoped to murder him. 

Jesus wanted his followers to watch him work and respond rather than substitute their ingenuity and planning. They didn’t become champions of the political or religious world. They didn’t fit into either and were persecuted by both. They were lied about, stoned, imprisoned, and martyred, and yet the life of Jesus found a way through it all to reveal himself to the world. 

Children of the light are not perfect people, but sensitive followers of Jesus, with a trust in him stronger than their own perspective.

 

Succumbing to the Night

It isn’t easy to live as children of the light when everything about this world seeks to draw us back into the darkness. It can happen so subtly that we don’t even realize it, until we feel empty and lost. Jesus warned his followers that the end of days would be particularly challenging to keep our hearts embedded in the light. “At that time many will fall away and will betray and hate one another, and many false prophets will arise and mislead many. Because of the multiplication of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold.” (Matthew 24:10-12) He added that the very elect would be deceived unless he cut the days short. 

Whenever we abandon love for any other agenda, we are easily deceived by power, just like the Pharisees. They had divided the world into those who were acceptable to God and those who weren’t. They were more concerned about law than life and found it easy to hate those who were not like them. That’s why they didn’t recognize God’s Son when he stood right before them. They got caught up manipulating the politics of the day instead of looking for a city whose builder is God. 

We already see false prophets leading God’s people astray, putting their hope in a political leader who advances their desires. Even though he is the moral opposite of Jesus Christ, those prophets have anointed him as the political savior of Christianity, and by doing so, their love for God and others has grown cold. Those who follow them are playing in the realm of human power and have lost sight of the day. 

They still give lip service to Jesus despite losing touch with his nature and love. They are so preoccupied with the quest for power to fulfill their ambitions or seven-mountain mandate, thinking the eternal kingdom can come by coercion, manipulation, and arrogance. And don’t think the same dynamics aren’t at work in the political left. This is not a contest between liberal and conservative, but between darkness and light. This is not about what policies you prefer, but the fear and anger that an elite class manipulates to gain power over a nation. 

The majority Christian view has almost always been on the wrong side of historical crossroads—from crusades and inquisitions to colonial conquest and slavery to racism and Apartheid, even to Hitler’s rise in Nazi Germany. Whenever Christianity aligned itself with the power of empire, it was seduced into tactics of the night, forsaking the priorities of God’s kingdom. There was a day when you could engage the democratic process without compromising participation in Jesus’s kingdom, but that’s nearly impossible today. The amount of money, lies, and anger that are part of our process on both sides negates the love of Christ. 

That’s why many feel they just don’t fit in anymore—not to the religious environment they grew up in or the political party they championed at a younger age. Over the last thirty years, Jesus has been calling his bride back to himself, raising up followers who can see through the illusion of Christianity as a human-built religion made up of doctrines and regulations that emptied the cross of its power. 

Sadly, some of those have gone on to try to recreate their own systems promising a more authentic experience and have been found wanting. But others have spent time in the wilderness of faith, looking for the truth and community that only Jesus can provide. That has taken many of them out of the institutions in which their faith was nurtured so that it could grow. They have been scorned and mocked, the quality of their faith questioned because they no longer conformed to the expectations of their family and friends. 

In the process, however, they have reconnected to Jesus as a real presence. Their faith sent roots deep into God’s character and nature. Trusting in his love for them, they know how Father’s love holds them in the storm and how his presence and wisdom can guide them through anything. They have become children of the day without the fear or anger that others can manipulate.

 

Simeon and Anna

Children of the day were like Simeon and Anna when Jesus first came—two elderly people who hoped they would see the Messiah before death. Sure enough, in the temple courts, they saw an infant barely a month old and recognized in him the salvation of Israel. They saw in that baby a reality that more educated minds couldn’t recognize in a thirty-something man who had been healing and teaching throughout Israel.  

They were tuned into a reality others could not see. Many in Israel were so focused on overthrowing Rome and claiming their country back that they missed him when he came with a greater redemption than political change could accomplish. They were not ready to embrace the infant at the temple, or the itinerant preacher who spoke wisdom they could not manipulate for their ends. 

In the last days, people like Simeon and Anna will wait patiently for a promise against all hope. They will see the signs leading to his return. They will see him standing at the door, ready to fulfill in his own humanity what God had in mind from the Creation of the world. The darkness of those days won’t overwhelm them because their eyes are fixed on a brighter light. 

The final chapter of redemption’s story is about to be written. This is a contest for the soul of the universe, pitting love and light against selfishness and darkness. Some live oblivious to this conflict, while others are discerningly aware. 

In preparation for those days, he is calling a people who will bear his glory in the world. They will be known for their love and for upholding God’s justice in treating others with graciousness and compassion.

 

Comfortable in Uncertainty

The greatest joy of finding security in the presence of Jesus is that people no longer seek it from worldly circumstances. Confident in his love and care, they realize he can guide them through anything. Their comfort is set to his presence, not their desired outcomes. 

Years ago, I began to meet people who were comfortable with uncertainty. I was intrigued because it seemed so foreign to me. My Type-A personality was more inclined to manipulate my circumstances, or more honestly, trying to enlist God to do so, for whatever I desired. It just so rarely worked because God was not invested in my agenda. Living that way was exhausting, borrowing anxiety from future events that never happened and for which there was no provision.

I was intrigued by those who could take each day as it came. They didn’t have a lot of resources in earthly terms, but didn’t seem to need them. They were confident that God would give them what they needed when the time came. They learned to hold their fears of the future in suspicion because they could rarely foresee accurately what was to come. Never panicking, never manipulating, and never fearful, they walk with a growing trust in the Father. 

Through crisis and tragedy, they had learned that God was faithful to provide for them each day whatever they needed.  Worrying about the future became unnecessary. They came to see that God’s grace, like his provision, is served up in daily doses. We can be so distracted by our imagined future that we miss how he wants to guide us today. 

These were the people I wanted to be near, for they were at peace in times of extremity, able to listen and respond to Jesus’s leading. Also, they reflected his character invitingly, being people of compassion, integrity, and gentleness. Being with them constantly refreshed me and made me long to learn how to trust God like they did.

All the while, Jesus kept inviting me to find fulfillment in his desires and purpose instead of mine. That also came through moments of extremity and frustration when he provided answers I would never have contemplated. My anxieties began to whither, and with them came the exhaustion of serving them. 

Children of the light are comfortable in uncertainty because their confidence is in the nature and character of Jesus, not their circumstances. How do you learn to live this way? It won’t come from a book; it will come from interacting with him through your anxieties, scheming, and struggles. As you learn how unhelpful it is to try to control the outcomes of your own life, you’ll discover a better life awaits. 

Slowly, a growing trust in Father’s love will push aside the need to have circumstances turn out the way you prefer. Instead of being frustrated about what he isn’t doing, you’ll watch him care for you through times of struggle and pain in ways you’d never have imagined. On the day you realize he knows best about everything in your life, you’ll find yourself comfortable in the uncertainties of life.

That will allow Jesus’s character to find a home in you. Without the anxieties of what may come, you’ll be more present in the moment with his compassion and kindness toward others. Then you’ll not only live in that light, but you will become the light for others to see the glory of God’s goodness. 

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Order Part 1 of It’s Time from Amazon in Kindle or paperback, or read previous chapters online.

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Chapter 18: Holding God’s Pain 

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Note: This is the eighteenth in a series of letters written for those living at the end of the age, whenever that comes in the next fifteen years or the next one hundred and fifty years. We have already released the first part of this book in print. You can also access the previous chapters here.  If you are not already subscribed to this blog and want to ensure you don’t miss any of them, you can add your name here.

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As I have read the previous letters, I can’t help but wonder what God is thinking as he views the atrocities of human history. Is he angry at the wars we wage, or the power the wealthy hold over the poor? Can we even know what he feels?
— Ivanna, wife and mother who also operates a bakery in Ukraine

Ivanna, 

I’m so sorry for what has happened over the past three years in your country. The uncertainty, devastation, and bloodshed must weigh heavily on your heart. You are in my prayers.

Of course, we can’t speak definitively about what God thinks or feels. His ways are much higher than ours; his perspective is beyond our finite view. He does not see death as an end. However, we get glimpses of his thoughts because he makes himself known to his people. I sense things about him when I pray for people or events. They are momentary glimpses, to be sure, but there would be no communion if there were no exchange of heart and mind. 

Honestly, I don’t sense much anger in him, which is shocking for someone who grew up with terrifying stories about an angry God. When we’re victimized, anger rises quickly, and we want God to share it. But when Jesus lived among us, we didn’t see him angry or seeking vengeance. What we see is love, and in that love, sorrow and grief for what we suffer and for those who refuse him. He didn’t come to bring condemnation but forgiveness and salvation. Maybe we misunderstood those Old Testament stories after all. 

His redemption is not powered by anger but love, meriting our trust, not our fear. This may be most critical for last-day believers. I want to share with you a personal encounter that has profoundly impacted me, and the doors it has opened in deepening my walk with God, and having more compassion for those who are lost in the darkness is profound. But before I do, let me remind you of that moment Jesus sought to share his anguish with his closest friends. 

 

Watch with Me 

The night before he died on the cross, Jesus was “consumed with sorrow.” He went to the Garden of Gethsemane to sort things out with his Father and invited three of his disciples to share that intimate moment. His pain was immense, distressed enough that his sweat became like drops of blood. What did he hope to gain by having them there, or what would it give them? 

Perhaps it’s as simple as Jesus did not want to be alone, and their presence would comfort him? Could he also have wanted to show them something about his heart? We don’t really know because they slept through it, unable to watch with him even for an hour. 

He warned them to “Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation.” They couldn’t stay awake long enough and fell into temptation that night, abandoning their friend in his hour of need. Surely, they didn’t realize what was going on that night, and perhaps their slumber was a way to dissociate from the disconcerting talk of his leaving them.  

The redemption of the world hung in the balance, and to accomplish it, Jesus had to choose to endure the most horrific torments of unjust humanity. He was distressed at the prospect and hoped there might be another way to redeem humanity. And yet, he settled it in his heart with, “My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.

Jesus did escape temptation that night, but I can’t help wondering what it would have been like for the disciples to share that moment with Jesus. Was sorrow and grief his alone to bear, or was there something for them to learn inside his suffering?

 

“Now You’re Ready to Hold My Pain”

Honestly, I would never have considered experiencing God’s pain except for an engagement I had with him over two years ago. I woke up early one morning for a medical appointment. As I got dressed, I felt deep sorrow and grief, which was strange since I hadn’t gone to bed that way. 

The previous three years had been brutal. My wife encountered a previously unknown childhood trauma, only to be told by her therapist that she must be married to an abusive husband. She left me when I was out of town, and it took us weeks to sort through the lies and find our way back to each other. Also, I had lost a meaningful, lifelong relationship when some in my extended family spread lies about me. 

Even though those situations had been mostly resolved by that morning, all the emotions were back. On my drive, I wanted to sort that out with God. I found myself praying, “Last year I lost every family relationship I valued to lies about me.” Tears streamed down my face as I relived it. And wanting to bring God into that pain, I added, “And you allowed it to happen.” As soon as I said it, I knew I was putting blame in the wrong place. 

So, I repeated my pain again, this time adding, “And you watched it happen.”  That was true enough, but again, not fair to him. He hadn’t watched as some dispassionate observer.

One last time I prayed, “Last year I lost every family relationship I valued to lies about me, and you were with me in it.” There it was! He had been with me through it all to bring healing where he could and guide me where others weren’t open to it. Into my pain seeped his love and even joy that I had not been alone. 

After reveling in the sanctity of that reality, a strange thought ran through my head. Now you are ready to hold some of my pain. It seemed like God whispering to me, but I had no idea what it meant. What pain did he have, and why did he want me to hold it? Then, a second thought explained the first. I lost every relationship I value to lies about me. 

It took a moment for that to sink in. From the serpent’s lie in Eden, down through history to those who reject him today because they don’t know who he is, God has been the victim of the worst lies. Thinking of what God has suffered by human unfaithfulness, I began to weep again, overwhelmed with a sorrow greater than my own. I know I only got a small taste of his pain that morning, but I find him inviting me there often.  

 

The Fellowship of His Suffering

When Paul referred to the fellowship of his suffering in Philippians 3, I have always taken it to mean that Jesus comforts us inside our pain. He understands what we go through because he has experienced more pain than we ever could. Shared suffering lets us know him at a depth we would miss otherwise.

However, I never noted that it’s his suffering we fellowship in, not just our own. I skipped over that part since his pain was already past. What would he suffer now? My conception of God is that he exists in victory and dwells in peace and beauty. We hope to join him there someday. If the state of the world pained him, wouldn’t he just fix it?

Since that morning, I’ve learned that the world’s brokenness touches the Godhead deeply. Jesus didn’t just suffer during his week of passion. It wasn’t just Gethsemane, his trial, or the cross, but also at Lazarus’ tomb for the grief of his friends. Earlier, he had looked at the crowds with compassion and saw many who were “harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” The writer of Hebrews told us he often offered loud cries and tears to God. (Hebrews 5:7) 

As our empathetic high priest, he holds humanity with intense love even as many reject him. How could he not suffer, not just then but now? This broken creation offers up constant tragedy, war, abuse, oppression, disease, and lies that devastate people he loves. Wouldn’t that touch God more deeply than it touches us?

My greatest tears have been shed not for myself but for the pain or loss of people I love. What is worse, our own suffering or that of our children? That morning, I discovered the agony inside of God for the lostness of his Creation. It was not pain for his loss but for ours. He holds us in his heart, quite aware of our suffering, and it powers his desire to bring redemption in the most devastating circumstances. I have come to view the world through that lens. 

 

Holding God’s Pain 

In Chapter 11, I wrote about how learning to gaze with God changed my prayer life. I no longer found myself trying to convince him to do what I wanted, but to help me see the events in my life and the world through his eyes. Knowing a small measure of his loss in the broken creation has brought me closer to him. As I gaze with God at world events, I find greater freedom from my self-preoccupation, which allows me to find a deeper place in his heart. 

How do I hold pain with God? I sit with him, gazing at the circumstance that concerns me, contemplating it from his perspective. I wait until I have a sense what he feels in that. Sometimes, it takes days or weeks, as I wait for him to show me.

As I get a glimpse of that, I reflect on the emotion or insight he brings. It has shaped my prayers in interesting ways. I don’t try to fix his pain or offer my ideas for a way out. I hold my heart alongside his and see what comes. I reflect on his power and wisdom as I remind myself that everything is in his hands. That helps me look beyond the pain to hear the refrain of his love seeping through. He is not alarmed or disturbed because his plan is unfolding. He’s the Redeemer in this story and will prevail overall.

This may not be for everyone. Indeed, don’t start here. Until you’ve tasted deeply of his love for you in your own anguish and learned to trust him, trying to imagine God’s pain will only draw you into despair. Let him share your pain before you look to share his. He’ll invite you in when you are ready, but I suspect I’m not the only one who has tasted this. 

I find it curious that Jesus didn’t need a lot of people to do this. He only asked three of his disciples. I wish at least one of them had stayed with him through it. It’s a tender moment to be in fellowship with his suffering and to know his heart for lost people. Sharing that is a deep place of intimacy. I am intrigued and excited at what might lie down this road for me and others who feel a similar call. 

 

How It Has Changed Me

Why would he want any of us to watch with him in this season of redemptive history? 

I’m honestly not sure what it does for him. It may simply be what friendship does; it holds each other’s pain as well as their joy. The pain I felt when my wife was gone is my teacher here. What I felt for her then and now puts me in touch with what God feels for the brokenness in his creation. It has changed me in a variety of ways. 

First, I see world events differently. A few decades ago, my world was conveniently divided into a home team and an away team. God loves those who acknowledge him. I could pray with passion for God to alleviate their suffering. God hates the away team, and we can pray down his vengeance on them, which gave me false comfort in my anger and helplessness. Dividing the world that way made it simpler to route my grief and fear in times of tragedy. 

I just don’t believe any of it anymore. Love taught me how misguided I was. God’s heart breaks for the whole of humanity, for those who know him and those who don’t. Today, he holds the same grief for the Palestinian mom mourning her child as he does for the Jewish mom grieving hers. That doesn’t discount the horrible evil people bring into the world, but it does change the way I pray both for victims and victimizers. I’ve been invited to a different kingdom where love defines our responses, not vengeance or righteous indignation. Just how did we think Jesus would tell us to love our enemies and think God gets to hate his?

Second, I don’t want to add any more pain to the planet. I am more mindful in my engagements with people to treat them fairly, lovingly, and honor my relationship with them. I also want to live generously toward those in pain to help relieve my Father’s anguish on their behalf.

Third, I’ve discovered how these moments with him expose the deeper places in my heart. Solomon said, “Sorrow is better than laughter, for a sad countenance is good for the heart.” (Ecclesiastes 7:3) We all crave times of joy, but it is sorrow and grief that allow us to drill down to the deepest places where we discover what is most important. 

Fourth, I read Scripture differently, seeing an anguished Godhead rather than an angry one. While we may want to lash out and blame others for our suffering, Jesus is not inclined to do so. As I read the Old Testament prophets now, I see anguish for the wayward, not anger. This is the power of the laments. It is not just our pain being held there but his too. And at the same time, we see his capacity to spread redemption in the world amid human suffering.  

Fifth, it has changed my heart for the lost. Now, loving my enemies becomes possible because I see them as those convulsing in pain for living outside of God’s reality. Truly, they do not know what they do to others as they compensate for their loneliness and believe the lies of darkness. 

 

Ecstasy and Agony 

Ivanna, lest you think holding some of God’s pain leads to a despairing life, I assure you it does not. Remember, God not only grieves for humanity, but he is also the most joyful presence in the universe. Jesus said he wanted his joy to be in us so our joy could be complete. 

Because of him, I now know that agony and ecstasy can co-exist in the same space. I once thought they were mutually exclusive. Times of pain overwhelmed everything else and drove out my joy until they ended. Now, I can hold my pain before him and at the same time look for his joy to be there as well. I have learned that from watching him. As much as he feels the brokenness of humanity, he also delights in the redemption he brings to it. 

One friend said, “It seems he wants us to hold in our hearts the agony of the world and the victory of the cross simultaneously.” I love that. That may not make much sense until you experience it, but once you do, you can find contentment in whatever situation you are in.  

Jesus’s friends couldn’t hold his pain on the eve of his crucifixion, but we can today.  Over the past two years, it has transformed my thinking—how I view others and how to find the redemption story in the unfolding realities of our ever-darkening world. It saves me from giving in to anger and vengeance and finding a place for love to thrive in my prayers and heart.

As the earth moves relentlessly towards its inevitable conclusion in Christ, we can partner with him by holding his pain and praying to advance his purpose in current events. If I don’t see what he sees, I’m only left to offer up fruitless requests for my comfort or agenda in the gathering darkness. 

The people who will be most helpful at the end of days are those who know both his agony and his ecstasy.

 

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Chapter 17: Embracing God in Your Pain

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Note: This is the seventeenth in a series of letters written for those living at the end of the age, whenever that comes in the next fifteen years or the next one hundred and fifty years. We have already released the first part of this book in print. Or you can access the previous chapters here.  If you are not already subscribed to this blog and want to ensure you don’t miss any, you can add your name here.

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To be an evangelical in rural France is to be a minority of minorities. Even my family has ostracized me. You talk about God using our troubles to transform us, but I don’t see how he does that. I’ve spent my entire life avoiding pain, asking God to end it when it comes, and being angry when he doesn’t. How can I come to appreciate God at work in my suffering?

—Jean-Paul, a young father living in the Loire Valley in France

Dear Jean-Paul,

You ask a critically important question. It has taken most of my life to discover how to embrace God in my suffering. Like many, I grew up with the silly notion that God would protect me from pain. I could quote Scriptures that seemed to suggest it, except for persecution, of course. And, since I live in America, that isn’t supposed to happen.

So, whenever I felt in pain, I would ask God to take it away. Rarely did he, which led me to doubt his love, the quality of my faith, or whether the Bible was true. Even the culture was enamored with the question of suffering. How could a loving God create a world with so much pain?

He didn’t, of course. The suffering in our world does not come from him but from the chaos of a creation out of sync with its Creator and the weakness of humanity with arrogance, greed, and selfishness. Calamities happen, people will take advantage of you; sickness, disease, and injury are a constant threat, and daily needs can overrun you. Looking back, I am amazed at how I missed all the Scriptures about how God works in incredible ways through suffering and that those who walk by faith will often find more trouble because they’re walking against the ways of the world.

So why didn’t I hear more teachings on how to suffer graciously or find what God is doing through it? It seems we would rather hope for a quick miracle and deal with the frustration of it not happening than embrace suffering. Some of the most painful conversations I have are with people who genuinely believe that if God loved them, he would ensure that nothing bad could happen to them that he wouldn’t immediately fix.

So, thanks for your question, Jean-Paul. Let me take a stab at helping you transit pain in a way that brings God’s goodness out of it. Finding God’s love at the extremity of human suffering is a sacred gift. Here are the thoughts that help me when troubles come.

 

Invite God Along

I know that seems simple, but it’s easy to push God out of our suffering and try to handle it with our own strength. We do that in several ways. The most common is to blame him. Whether you think he orchestrated or just allowed it won’t matter. How do you run to someone for aid and comfort when you think they’re the source of your pain? He certainly isn’t, but many think he is. However, he can walk us through it, even utilizing it to do a deep work within. 

Another way we push him aside is to try to ignore our pain. Denial and overcompensating with coping mechanisms will crowd him out as well. Embrace the pain you’re in and invite him into it. This is where the children of the New Creation can shine brightest. When you find redemption in the difficulties of this world and demonstrate what it is to be his beloved child through it, the world is yours.

Finally, we push him away by only thinking that our circumstances will be resolved through healing or miraculous provision. Many people mistakenly set their perception of God’s love based on how he answers their prayers or resolves their circumstances.

That’s not to say we won’t rant and question him when we are surprised by pain but don’t expect many answers there. When we treat God as our adversary, hearing him say, “I’m sorry you’re going through this,” is nearly impossible. And knowing he’s empathetic to our struggle allows us to lean into his care and listen to his heart. So, hopefully, when trouble hits, we can find a way to settle into his love and invite him inside our pain. The fellowship of suffering is deep and intimate.

Embracing God at moments of extremity always involves surrender, laying down my fears and accusations, and being determined to find out how he loves me through this. Whether it is a marriage breaking up, grief, cancer diagnosis, betrayal of a friend or family, or needs bigger than my resources, I find a place of surrender to him. “If possible, take this cup from me, but if not, I choose to trust you through it” is where I best recognize him.

It allows my heart to stay open to a miracle should he desire it but, at the same time, honor the pain that has entered my life. When God is no longer your adversary or even the reluctant Father who won’t give you what you want, you’ll realize that no matter how dark things get, he is working for you. From his experience, Jesus knows the pain that life can deal out and how it is to find his Father in it. When you do that, you’ll begin to see his way through it and the fruit he is developing in you.

He can show you if you suffer from reaping something you have sown. If you suffer because of your arrogance, indulgence, and selfishness, he will still be with you, leading you to repentance, humility, and further freedom. However, undeserved suffering opens doors into the depths of God’s heart. That’s why Peter warned the early Christians to take care to ensure they don’t deserve what they suffer. Hardship caused by the sin or injustice of others opens a greater pathway to God’s heart.

 

Embrace Hardship as Discipline 

One of the things that helps me face suffering comes from Hebrews. “Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children.” (Hebrews 12:7) If you think of that as chastisement, you’ll miss the point entirely. He’s not referring to an angry father punishing you because of his disappointment; this is a loving Father who uses the brokenness of this world to teach us the discipline of his ways.

Every trouble we encounter is a training ground to deepen our walk with him. God recycles everything, even the injustice of others, as a tool to draw us more deeply into his way of thinking. What you go through today prepares you for what may yet come down the road. We always hope our current moment of suffering is our last, but life in a broken world will continue to throw difficulties at you, and all the more as we come to the end of the age.

Those of us raised in more comfortable circumstances usually have a real aversion to pain. We’ll do anything to avoid it. And our only approach when it comes, is to seek immediate relief, even trying to enlist God’s help to do that. None of this prepares us to manage our pain redemptively.

Paul had a different approach. Listen to how he negotiated the horrible things that befell him: “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body.” (2 Cor 4:8-10) Paul drew a fantastic distinction between what could happen to him and what Jesus could do with it on the inside. 

Hardship offers us a doorway to transformation as well as a doorway to anger and bitterness. If we can embrace whatever suffering comes our way and, more significantly, embrace God inside of it, we’ll find the door to life. The writer of Hebrews adds this, “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of justice and peace for those who have been trained by it.” (Hebrews 12:11)

A friend from South Africa and I recently discussed how love cannot be learned as a technique without being experienced. He added, “But we can learn how to lean deeper into love, accept suffering as the training ground to diminish the ego, and so learn how to let love flow out even to those who hate us and those who spitefully use us.”

That is a powerful way to live. None of us like to have our ego diminished, but that is how we learn to love in this world. Even Jesus learned obedience amid loud cries and tears through the things that he suffered. (Hebrews 5:7-8) How important would it be for us to learn the same way? Don’t waste your pain; let it change you, leaving you more surrendered to the God who loves you more than anyone else ever has or ever will.

If you want his glory to be revealed in you, learn to embrace hardship rather than run from it. “Rejoice; inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.” (1 Peter 4:12–13)

 

Ask Answerable Questions 

The first question we are prone to ask in times of trouble is, “Why?” Why me? Why didn’t God protect me from this? I have discovered that ‘why’ questions almost always lead down a darker road of grief and doubt. In my experience, they are usually impossible to answer because our finite perspective is too limited for a satisfyingly logical answer.

I used to challenge God with those questions before I learned to live in his love. “Why are you doing this to me?” “Why won’t you give me a miracle to take it away?” I have even prayed vengeance on those who have caused my anguish and, by doing so, lost sight of love. Thus, for all my whining, I never got a helpful answer.

I discovered a few years ago that I had stopped asking such questions without realizing it. Two decades ago, I was talking to a friend who wanted me to explain why God allowed his wife to leave him. It was then I recognized how long it had been since I raised that kind of question with God, and it felt awkward. That’s when I realized my questions had changed from why to where or how. “Where are you in this pain?” “How are you making your love available to me here?”  “How do you want me to navigate this trial?”

Answers to those questions seep into my heart over time. I switched to those questions because they were more answerable. They allowed me to grasp his love and wisdom rather than seeking some contrived justification unbefitting his character.

 

Stay Inside the Day

We add to our suffering whenever we get too far ahead of ourselves. Pain is best managed one day at a time. Rather than worrying about how long it will last, it is far better to ask, “Do I have what I need to get through today?” That’s all we are promised. Grace is meted out in daily portions. Jesus explicitly warned us not to worry about tomorrow, for today has enough challenges of its own. (Matthew 6:34)

When I was diagnosed with a fractured vertebra and the cancer that caused it, I was shocked. I had no idea this was coming. As my doctors charted out my next few months, including back surgery and a lifetime of chemotherapy, it was too overwhelming to consider. I intentionally decided to take on this challenge one day at a time. What do I need to get through this day?

Did I pray to be healed?  Who wouldn’t if you believe he does such things?  But I did not put all my hope in a miracle I couldn’t guarantee. So, I would talk to Jesus about healing, but I would look for his leading to walk through each day of this. I certainly was not going to try and earn it.

That meant I would do whatever I saw to do each day. Sara and I made decisions about our medical options, and when that became back surgery, I did what I could each day to manage the pain and keep looking to him. I left my questions in trust with Jesus, and I knew he would answer them when I needed them.

Also, staying inside the day allowed me to look for his presence, joy, and beauty each day. If I wait for joy until a miracle, medicine, or endurance has its work, I’ll be worn out with sorrow. Each day, find something that brightens your heart by getting out into nature or gazing at it through your window or video. Listen to music that calms you. Talk to people who inspire you.

 

Don’t Go It Alone 

None of us were meant to bear our struggles alone. Invite your community along for the ride as a source of encouragement and wisdom. This is not posting your need on Facebook or submitting a prayer request to the congregation’s website or bulletin. Invite three or four people to walk through the crisis with you.

Ideally, these relationships are already close. You have offered them the same presence during their struggles that you now ask of them. You know they will talk to Jesus about you and allow him to put Scriptures or other encouragements on their heart. Hopefully, you will check in with each other every few days.

With my recent cancer diagnosis, I had three friends located in three different countries who I knew were suffering from this same disease. Their empathy and information were a calming influence as my own journey unfolded.

Protracted suffering or a chronic condition can provide a unique challenge here. Ensure you are not just using your friends as targets of grumbling or complaining. You can be honest about that too but don’t stay there. People who want to be alongside you will be exhausted by hopeless complaints or only praying for a miracle that is not coming. You are looking for a conversation about how God navigates your heart through it, so there is hope and encouragement. That may not be an easy road to find, but community will make it far easier than going it alone.

 

Look for Ways to Be Redemptive

Just because you are in need doesn’t mean you have to focus all your attention on yourself. Pain is easier to negotiate when you can find ways to bless others.

Every day, I’m reminded how much Sara discovering her trauma has reshaped the trajectory of both of our lives into such an incredibly beautiful space. It has been excruciatingly painful, but I love the fresh air here, clearer perspective, and greater trust in Jesus through uncertainty. And her ability to encourage others in similar struggles helps her navigate her own.

When I see how holding my pain encourages others to navigate their own, my heart rejoices, and my endurance is enhanced. As you discover his goodness during dark days, look for ways to share it with others. Here’s where suffering does its most beautiful work. When we are less focused on ourselves, the load becomes easier to bear. And having traversed deep waters, you’ll be able to stand with those who face them as well.

When you suffer injustice from others, you’ll never want to do it to anyone else. When you are lied about or betrayed by someone you love and don’t grow bitter, you’ll never want to do it to anyone else. When you’ve suffered heartbreak, disease, or grief, you’ll have more empathy to offer others and wisdom as well.

 

Don’t Forget the Glory to Come

In the verse preceding Paul’s statement about the Creation longing for the children of God to be revealed, which is the theme verse of this book, he wrote,  “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” (Romans 8:18)

Suffering in Christ always gives way to glory. That’s why it’s worth it, Jean-Paul, to embrace Jesus in our pain and suffering. Not only can he get you through it, but he will leave you a better person in its wake. While we can often see how that bears fruit in this life, we don’t yet know how that will reveal his glory in the ages to come.

But I suspect it most certainly will.

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Chapter 17: Embracing God in Your Pain Read More »

Chapter 16: The God-Shaped Life, Part II

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Note: This is the sixteenth in a series of letters written for those living at the end of the age, whenever that comes in the next fifteen years or the next one hundred and fifty years. We have already released the first part of this book in print. Or you can access the previous chapters here.  If you are not already subscribed to this blog and want to ensure you don’t miss any, you can add your name here.

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I love what you started with Francesca. I, too, am tired of trying to change myself and want to see God take shape in me. Is that what Paul meant when he wrote about the renewing of our mind? 

— Gilbert, a 22-year-old seminary student in Chicago, IL

 

Hi Gilbert, 

Exactly. The renewing of the mind is the process by which he takes shape in us. Popular culture today would probably refer to that as the rewiring of our brain, which is a much more powerful image. 

We know now that people who were abused as children suffered trauma that wired their brains to react to circumstances differently than those who have not had trauma. That’s why trying to get them to act differently is fruitless. They live under the constant perception of threat and react by fighting, flight, or fawning. 

Without minimizing people who have suffered horrible trauma by abuse or war, I wonder if God views our sins and failures like I have come to view Sara’s childhood trauma. There’s no blame, only compassion to help her find freedom. 

We were all born with a self-preferring nature in a hostile world. Without Jesus, we were helpless against the power of sin, even when we tried to do better. Furthermore, sin caused us to feel abandoned by the God who made us. Those are classic characteristics of trauma—a lack of agency to protect ourselves and a feeling of abandonment by the one who is supposed to care for us.

So, yes, Jesus wants to rewire our brains so we no longer react to the lies of darkness and self-indulgence. That’s why Jesus didn’t live trying to follow the rules. Instead, he lived with a mind shaped by his Father’s affection. That allowed him to grasp the truth about himself and his world. 

Because he thought differently, he saw people and circumstances as they really were. That’s why he was tuned into their needs and could treat them with compassion, tenderness, and humility. You can’t substitute law, rules, or guidelines for that. It’s a glorious process that goes far deeper than a mere behavioral change. We cannot do it for ourselves; he has to do it in us.

As Jesus settles us in Father’s love, we will be able to recognize the truth of what’s going on around us. We’ll respond out of his love and trust instead of reacting out of our doubts and fears. We won’t need God to tell us what to do at every moment because we learn to think the way he does. Transformation in our actions begins with our engagement with God. He rewires how we think, which will change how we live—naturally and organically. We don’t bring our effort to that process; we only have to offer a willing heart and the patience to see the process through.

As an added benefit, when we realize we can’t change ourselves, we won’t fall prey to the misguided notion that we can change others. We can encourage them both by our words and example, but forcing people to do what we think best will only backfire. Paul was so committed to that process that it felt like giving birth. “My dear children, for whom I am again in the pains of childbirth until Christ is formed in you,” Galatians 4:19

Watching Jesus take shape in us is a miraculous process, often rising out of difficult moments when we give way to his leading instead of saving ourselves. As our trust grows in him, he is formed in us and makes himself known in the world.

The last chapter discussed how that produces sincere love and resilient trust. Now, we’ll look at three other characteristics that evidence Jesus taking shape in us: generous compassion, tender authenticity, and bold humility. Just remember, this is not what we pretend to be; it is what we become as he takes shape in us.

 

Generous Compassion 

I suspect deep compassion was humanity’s default setting before the fall. When unexpected adversity befalls people, almost everyone still displays it. Something deep inside us responds with empathy and concern for people in need, enough to move us to action if we have the means. The problem is that it is either short-lived or provoked by tragedy.

We pass people daily with deep wounds and needs without truly seeing or stopping to help. It’s often too overwhelming to add other people’s pain to our own. Generous compassion is not a generalized feeling of love for the masses; it is the fruit of loving “one another,” each person God gives us, one at a time. It is sacred to be touched by the need of another human enough to call us to action. 

So, how does walking with Jesus allow this generous compassion to take shape? 

First, the more we walk with him, the more clearly we’ll see how much he cares for us. When we no longer fight to get through the day, we will be more aware of others. We’ll finally see them for the first time because we’re not so absorbed in ourselves. That alone will stimulate our compassion and help us see the needs of others alongside our own.  

Second, as I come to know a generous Father, I will want to join him in his generosity. For a long time, overwhelmed with my needs, I didn’t see God as generous. He seemed to withhold what good he could do for reasons I didn’t understand. However, as I became more conversant with how he works, I saw his generosity every day. He did not necessarily give me everything I wanted, but he was always there to provide what I needed in abundance. How do you not share that?

Third, as Jesus untangles our fears and doubts, we have more emotional space to take an interest in people. No one will blurt out their needs to strangers, but they will open up to people with whom they are comfortable. Their struggles will easily touch us as we get to know them and offer whatever we can to alleviate their pain. We can hold their hurts, offering a caring heart, a listening ear, emotional support, time, or money. 

Fourth, we won’t block compassion as it stirs us. We’ve all learned tactics to help us push away compassion as it surges in us. We look for ways to blame others for their needs or comfort ourselves by minimizing their pain. But when we let compassion grow, we’ll know how to respond to them. Even when we are suffering at their hand, we will be able to respond like Jesus and Stephen did when they were being unfairly executed. “Forgive them; they do not know what they do.” Even the failures of the worst perpetrators are driven more by ignorance than intention, which opens the door to forgiveness. 

The early English translations of the Bible described Jesus as being moved by “bowels of compassion.” This expression is not used much today, even though most people feel empathy or compassion in their guts. We obviously can’t engage every person whose path we cross on a given day, but we can recognize in our own bodies when Jesus gives us compassion for another person. 

That’s why in the parable of the sheep and the goats, those caring for Jesus when he was naked, hungry, alone, or imprisoned had no idea they were doing it. “When did we see you that way?” It wasn’t an act; their actions were driven by compassion. When you see Jesus inside needy people, you can’t help but respond to them. 

Learn to recognize God’s generous compassion toward you, and sharing it with others will become second nature. 

 

A Tender Authenticity 

Who doesn’t want to live an authentic life?  How often have we walked away from conversations frustrated that we were too afraid to say what was on their minds, caving into what others might have wanted from us? We want to be accepted by people or at least not allow their judgment to feed our self-condemnation.  

Thus, we lose our ability to be genuine and honest as we play the games that seek to “win friends and influence people.” Unfortunately, that means we live as chameleons, trying to impress people instead of being true to our authentic selves. That’s a lonely life because no one knows who you really are. 

One of the best gifts about being affirmed in the Father’s love is that the opinions of others carry less weight. Both Jesus and Paul warned us that when we seek the approval of others, we won’t know the truth about anything—God, ourselves, or the situation we’re trapped in. Inside his love, we get to discover who we really are, and we’ll find we no longer need others to think well of us.  

The freedom to live authentically is a great gift, but by itself, it can make us obnoxious. In learning authenticity, many often overcompensate, speaking arrogantly or brashly so no one can appreciate what they’re trying to say. That’s why tenderness is so essential to add to authenticity. Though Jesus was truth itself, he took great care not to break a bruised reed or snuff out a smoldering wick. (Matthew 12:20) He didn’t want to add pain to the weakest or most marginalized members of society. 

Tenderness allows us to be authentic in the world and not damage others. It rises in us from Jesus’s example in the Gospels and in how he treats us. He is always faithful to himself but reveals no more than his audience can hear. He only resorted to stringent rebukes when his gentler overtures did not open a door, and even that fell on deaf ears. 

I don’t want my authenticity to overrun others or my speaking truth to cause another to stumble. The power of truth is most readily received when it comes with gentleness. It is hard enough to hear without our demeanor making people defensive instead of open. Can you imagine the freedom in any circumstance to be authentic and have enough love to be tender even toward those trying to harm you? 

In every encounter, we can look for that sweet spot where we never have to be less than ourselves. At the same time, we can approach everyone with a tenderness that will open the widest door to productive and fruitful relationships. 

 

A Bold Humility 

In our culture, boldness is associated with pushy arrogance, and humility with being a cowering wallflower. Neither serves Jesus or his purpose in the world. 

The people who have the least to say are often the first to speak up when an issue arises. They either crave attention or think of themselves as experts at everything. Just as often, those with something meaningful to say sit back, unwilling to fight for a place. As a result, we hear plenty of meaningless noise and little true wisdom.

In these last days, it is time for the wise to be bold without losing a sense of humility. They may get drowned out by more selfish voices, but their words will be there for those who have an ear to hear. 

Where does this boldness come from? Boldness on God’s behalf rises because love cannot remain silent in the face of abuse, deception, or destructive behaviors. When you care about those victimized by darkness, you will want to help them see God’s light. However, this boldness will be a thousand times more effective if it rises from a humble heart. 

And where does this humility come from? Anyone on the adventure of getting to know God realizes they don’t possess all the answers. They have been wrong so often that they hold lightly what they think they know now. While they are confident in what Jesus has taught them, they know they cannot force it on others. They have learned through numerous failures that truth in God’s kingdom comes as an invitation, not a demand.

Inside Jesus, we have nothing to prove, nothing to gain, and nothing to lose. Although they recognize that they have no power or responsibility to change the world or anyone in it, they can still point to the light in ways that give even their detractors the best opportunity to see it. Truly authentic people can speak the truth gently, often with a provocative question or an insightful observation. 

Paul wrote that when he spoke to people, he set “forth the truth plainly commending ourselves to everyone’s conscience in the sight of God.” (2 Corinthians 4:2) His goal was not to convince but to be as clear as he could and leave it to the Spirit and to conscience to convince and convict.  That’s the humility we need today. Their boldness will put truth into play, but with a humility that allows people to hear it.

 

Here’s the miracle: the more God takes shape in you, the more you become who you truly are. He doesn’t take you over; he expresses himself through you in the way that best befits who he created you to be.  

All five of these characteristics overlap in so many ways, creating a symphony in which God reveals himself to the world. That’s the strength of character God wants on display in the world. I could have summed all this up with the fruit of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.  Anyone who reflects genuine love, resilient trust, generous compassion, tender authenticity, and bold humility will undoubtedly be a gift in a tormented world. 

 

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Order Part 1 of It’s Time from Amazon in Kindle or paperback.

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Guesting on Another Podcast

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First, from the deepest place in our hearts Sara and I want to express our gratitude to all of you this Christmas season. Thank you for your engagements with us over the year and your love and support for Sara’s journey through trauma and now mine through a bit of cancer. I tell people all the time that I know some of the best people on this planet, who take their life in God seriously, but themselves not so much. That’s the best combination. We have grown so much in our conversations with you and how openly you share your own stories with us. In recent months we’ve been especially grateful for all the prayers, meals, encouragements, and kindnesses so many of you have directed our way, many from great distances, in our time of trial.

We are truly blessed to have you in our lives and pray that you have a very special Christmas with family and friends, and that Jesus will lead and guide you through the year ahead. Our hearts especially go out to those who because of family break-ups or grieving someone’s passing that you deeply loved are finding yourselves grieving while others are celebrating. We are praying that Father makes himself and his comfort known to you and fill you with his peace and joy. If we can be an encouragement there, please get in touch.

Merry Christmas, and a Blessed New Year to you and yours
from Wayne and Sara

Now on to some fun stuff—

A couple of weeks ago, I recorded an interview with Jason and Matt, who co-hosted an episode of Rethinking God with Tacos PODCAST. I love when I’m not the host and others get to probe my life and thoughts as it helps them. This is a special conversation that dropped last week. This is how they described it:

In this conversation, Wayne Jacobsen shares his transformative journey of understanding God’s love, the impact of his book ‘He Loves Me’, and the challenges he faced in his personal life, including health issues. He also shares a deeply personal story about trauma and breakthrough. The discussion also touches on theological shifts regarding atonement and the nature of true peace in the face of adversity. In this conversation, the guys explore the complexities of reconciliation, trauma, and the nature of justice in relationships. They discuss the importance of navigating personal trauma, recognizing toxic relationships, and the role of good counsel in healing. The dialogue emphasizes the need for trust in God’s justice and the transformative power of living loved, ultimately leading to restorative justice that heals both victims and perpetrators.

Also, a couple of weeks ago I wrote about a resurgence of interest in He Loves Me, and requests to publish new versions in Russia, Ukraine, and Israel. Now I get this email from Denis in France:

In April 2021 I discovered your book He Loves Me in French and it changed my perception of God’s love. Then I discovered the Shack too and I looked for nudges in my life like you! Now I share this around me, and two people have already done a full sharing (about a year) and 3 other people are just starting now. It’s like a stone that you throw on a calm lake, there are visible rebound of course but also and above all the wave that continues to propagate…it is the work of God through you!  I pray for you and Sara in this new part of your life

I got this about another book from a friend in Wales:

Something that we hope will encourage you, my wife has a home visit from a medical professional, who often opens her heart as she longs to break free from obligations and duty that her church expects from her. She has read several of your books that we have given her and recently on a flight back from Israel was reading Finding Church, so also was a fellow passenger sitting behind her over her shoulder. A conversation ensued, and some of your books are now hopefully being read in Cornwall!

And this from someone in the States about his journey to live loved:

For me it was very, very, very, very hard to get God’s love for me because as a recovering Pharisee, the slant of righteousness and justice that I was presented with most of my life made being loved by God hard to imagine.  It was your book about So You Don’t Want to Go to Church Anymore” that got me thinking about Jesus being loving.  I didn’t get it, but I wanted to.  That led me eventually to talk with you in person while you were in Massachusetts, and I still didn’t get it until God spoke to me personally.

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A Fresh Wave for He Loves Me

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While I am sidelined with my recovery from back surgery and some chemo, God seems to be stirring something with my book He Loves Me. In the last week I’ve had numerous emails about this book. Some people are starting book studies with friends or doing podcasts about it. It’s so much in one week that it has made me ponder what Father might be doing in this season with a book that is almost 25 years old.

Also, someone sent me a link to two people who did a deep dive into He Loves Me, but they did it in 21 minutes. I was impressed, though, with their conversation because it covered the significant themes in an engaging and enlightening way. You can listen to it here.

I also recorded a podcast on Tuesday with Discovering God with Tacos. It’s a funny name for it, and I thought I’d have to recuse myself since I’m not too fond of tacos, but they were gracious to let me join them anyway and talk a bit of BBQ while we’re discussing my journey. I can’t wait to share it with you when it airs. I’ll have to let you know when it does.

Finally, I’m getting emails from various places around the world that want to do translations and reprints. This includes Israel, Russia, and Ukraine. That hasn’t been easy to do with Hachette holding the rights to the book; they don’t like people putting up the book for free downloads. However, I’ve always been more concerned about the message getting out than the financial return on this book, so we are entering negotiations with Hachette to have the book returned to us so we can pursue these requests. Please pray we’ll be successful here.

What to make of all of this? I’m not sure. But it seems God is letting a whole new audience discover that book and its message. I’ve often said it is the most important book I’ll ever write because there’s nothing more critical than moving from an appeasement-based view of God to an affection-based relationship with him. He loves each of us more than anyone ever has or ever will, and when we come to discover that we’ll find ourselves on the journey of a lifetime, not only coming to rest in his goodness but also learning how that love begins to untwist sin, shame, and religious effort in us so that we can truly live as his people on the earth.

You can buy it in case lots at deep discounts here if you want to start a study on it or make it a Christmas gift to your friends.

As for me, my recovery continues to progress. I don’t have much back pain these days from surgery, so almost all recovered there, and I can manage a lot more things for myself. However, that also means we can ramp up the chemo drugs to higher doses, so we’ll have to see how that goes. I’ve felt pretty good the last couple of weeks, though, and have been able to get back to some writing and thinking that God is inviting me into. I’m grateful for that, though my endurance is somewhat limited. I do hope I can maintain that with these new drugs. Sara and I are thankful for all the love and support from so many of you at this time. God is at work, though not in the same way I would have hoped early on. That’s often true for all of us. He does know best, however, and when we trust him more than we trust our perceptions, the road gets less strenuous.

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