Someone mailed me a brochure recently that a former pastor had made one afternoon when he had way too much time on his hands. I found it hilariously tragic! I know it’s a bit edgy. I know not every Sunday-morning group out there would advance this notion. But I have been part of groups that live it this way, even if they would never have the courage to actually spell it out so clearly.
PLEASE!!!! This is not the gospel of Jesus Christ, it is the double-talking bondage of religion that takes us captive again to the rules and traditions of men, and does not free us to live deeply and freely with Father.
There is no way that is for real??!!! Are you serious? It’s a joke, right? Yes, I think some people think that way (including the friend I told you about the other day, Wayne) but… IN PRINT? Oh my. My, oh my.
The best line was probably, “Now read on for more good news…”
There is no way that is for real??!!! Are you serious? It’s a joke, right? Yes, I think some people think that way (including the friend I told you about the other day, Wayne) but… IN PRINT? Oh my. My, oh my.
The best line was probably, “Now read on for more good news…”
Actually, Greg, this was just a joke. Sorry if it seemed otherwise.
Wayne,
I was an Internet virgin when first I stumbled across this blog. So chaste I didn’t even know what a blog was – But I liked the content. So I cut and pasted some of it into an e-mail I then I sent to my daughter, away at graduate school. Receiving a positive response from her I thought I’d try it again. This next time, how ever, the Internet imps invaded. I ended up sending 2/3rds of a letter intended for my daughter to this blog and and my daughter received ##%***(^$#.
To my surprise, the response intended for my beloved (My daughter) got published in this blog. Burying my head in the sand of shame I never wrote to// participated in a blog again. That was perhaps a year ago. I’ve learned more about the Internet since then. Looking back on the experience, no one made fun of my inappropriate submission. No one even seemed to notice it.
It struck me recently as I thought about that whole folly. This blog – as the church is supposed to be – Is a place where you cannot offend. Let me say that again – A PLACE WHERE YOU CANNOT OFFEND. Doesn’t that sound nice? Like a pleasant land you’d want to visit. Maybe even live in? A PLACE WHERE YOU CANNOT OFFEND.
Isn’t that what our dialog with one another is supposed to mirror. Isn’t that what it means to know that we’re loved unendingly by a perfect Father? The security revealed through the cross – validated by the resurrection – confirmed by the Paraclete? Daily we live in a place – With a Father – Whom we cannot offend.
Thanks for all the second chances you’ve given people
tommy kurtyka
Actually, Greg, this was just a joke. Sorry if it seemed otherwise.
ROTFL — at first I thought this was serious because it is so refreshingly honest (in a revolting, blasphemous sort of way) but when I figured out it was tongue in cheek I nearly died laughing.
I need some of these brochures….. are you sure Dave Aldrich didn’t come up with this?
Wayne,
I was an Internet virgin when first I stumbled across this blog. So chaste I didn’t even know what a blog was – But I liked the content. So I cut and pasted some of it into an e-mail I then I sent to my daughter, away at graduate school. Receiving a positive response from her I thought I’d try it again. This next time, how ever, the Internet imps invaded. I ended up sending 2/3rds of a letter intended for my daughter to this blog and and my daughter received ##%***(^$#.
To my surprise, the response intended for my beloved (My daughter) got published in this blog. Burying my head in the sand of shame I never wrote to// participated in a blog again. That was perhaps a year ago. I’ve learned more about the Internet since then. Looking back on the experience, no one made fun of my inappropriate submission. No one even seemed to notice it.
It struck me recently as I thought about that whole folly. This blog – as the church is supposed to be – Is a place where you cannot offend. Let me say that again – A PLACE WHERE YOU CANNOT OFFEND. Doesn’t that sound nice? Like a pleasant land you’d want to visit. Maybe even live in? A PLACE WHERE YOU CANNOT OFFEND.
Isn’t that what our dialog with one another is supposed to mirror. Isn’t that what it means to know that we’re loved unendingly by a perfect Father? The security revealed through the cross – validated by the resurrection – confirmed by the Paraclete? Daily we live in a place – With a Father – Whom we cannot offend.
Thanks for all the second chances you’ve given people
tommy kurtyka
ROTFL — at first I thought this was serious because it is so refreshingly honest (in a revolting, blasphemous sort of way) but when I figured out it was tongue in cheek I nearly died laughing.
I need some of these brochures….. are you sure Dave Aldrich didn’t come up with this?
I be the one that sent it to Wayne. The author is a cut-up, that’s for sure. Reading the tract still makes us howl even though we’ve read it umpteen times.
Joe—Joe????? I know you’re reading this….
Are you going to make your blasphemy more accessible????
Sure – I can send the full brochure as a PDF file to anyone who isn’t too squeamish. My intention was more to make a spoof of religious tracts than to run down religion. I don’t like religion, but it’s not my job to denounce it either. However, if you’re man enough to read the whole thing, leave me a message here.
Please Joe could you send a PDF of this to me …..i really liked it ….funny, but also very helpful!
I be the one that sent it to Wayne. The author is a cut-up, that’s for sure. Reading the tract still makes us howl even though we’ve read it umpteen times.
Joe—Joe????? I know you’re reading this….
Are you going to make your blasphemy more accessible????
Sure – I can send the full brochure as a PDF file to anyone who isn’t too squeamish. My intention was more to make a spoof of religious tracts than to run down religion. I don’t like religion, but it’s not my job to denounce it either. However, if you’re man enough to read the whole thing, leave me a message here.
I sure could. Since I don’t have your email, if you email me at jcbrand@bresnan.net, I will be happy to send you (or anyone else) a copy. The full tract (8 panels) has slightly earthy humor, but if you don’t like it feel free to use the delete key.
Please Joe could you send a PDF of this to me …..i really liked it ….funny, but also very helpful!
I sure could. Since I don’t have your email, if you email me at jcbrand@bresnan.net, I will be happy to send you (or anyone else) a copy. The full tract (8 panels) has slightly earthy humor, but if you don’t like it feel free to use the delete key.
Gosh Wayne, for a minute there my heart started pumping! I thought, oh no, Wayne has fallen off the deep end! Whew… As always, thank you for pointing out the obvious. And I am so glad that this is not the gospel…
Gosh Wayne, for a minute there my heart started pumping! I thought, oh no, Wayne has fallen off the deep end! Whew… As always, thank you for pointing out the obvious. And I am so glad that this is not the gospel…
Excellent post and that tract is just pure craziness, there was like rules on there to follow (obey pastor, read bible, go to church, blow up abortion clinic, etc). This is religion at it’s death-defying finest and showing how damning a religion can be…never quite saw any freedom in that tract. I think it is this kind of stuff that really turned me off from church (actually blinded me from truth) and finding out what really was at the heart of the gospel.
I had to leave church and it’s indoctrination to become undoctrinated so I could read those words of Jesus without clutter. It was then that I saw obey pastor, read bible, pray 5 times a day, sing to God, dance, etc…was more an act for the church to view my salvation in action (oh yeah, he is definitely saved look at him dance) than of anything real inside me. Tear religion down one discussion at a time!
Excellent post and that tract is just pure craziness, there was like rules on there to follow (obey pastor, read bible, go to church, blow up abortion clinic, etc). This is religion at it’s death-defying finest and showing how damning a religion can be…never quite saw any freedom in that tract. I think it is this kind of stuff that really turned me off from church (actually blinded me from truth) and finding out what really was at the heart of the gospel.
I had to leave church and it’s indoctrination to become undoctrinated so I could read those words of Jesus without clutter. It was then that I saw obey pastor, read bible, pray 5 times a day, sing to God, dance, etc…was more an act for the church to view my salvation in action (oh yeah, he is definitely saved look at him dance) than of anything real inside me. Tear religion down one discussion at a time!
So, it turns out that this is a joke. I do have a sense of humor, but I don’t like being deceived. Everybody seems to talk about “love” on this site, but I don’t find this post very loving. If the artwork had in fact been authentic, we should be praying for the author, not holding it up as evidence of their depravity. Forgiveness is the key, people. We must learn to forgive those who’ve hurt us, and encourage others to do the same. I hope this particular post will disappear, or at least be modified with an annotation that it is not the truth.
Disappointed,
I’m sorry you felt deceived. I can assure you that I did not post this hoping people would think it was an actual tract. I thought my set-up in the first paragraph about this being done by a ‘former pastor’ with ‘way too much time on his hands’ made it clear that this was intended as satire to make a profound point that ‘the church’ is not the way to life in the Father.
Knowing the man who did it, I can assure you his heart was not to hurt others, simply expose a way of thinking that makes us miss the mark.
Again, please accept my apologies for not being clearer…
Wayne
So, it turns out that this is a joke. I do have a sense of humor, but I don’t like being deceived. Everybody seems to talk about “love” on this site, but I don’t find this post very loving. If the artwork had in fact been authentic, we should be praying for the author, not holding it up as evidence of their depravity. Forgiveness is the key, people. We must learn to forgive those who’ve hurt us, and encourage others to do the same. I hope this particular post will disappear, or at least be modified with an annotation that it is not the truth.
Disappointed,
I’m sorry you felt deceived. I can assure you that I did not post this hoping people would think it was an actual tract. I thought my set-up in the first paragraph about this being done by a ‘former pastor’ with ‘way too much time on his hands’ made it clear that this was intended as satire to make a profound point that ‘the church’ is not the way to life in the Father.
Knowing the man who did it, I can assure you his heart was not to hurt others, simply expose a way of thinking that makes us miss the mark.
Again, please accept my apologies for not being clearer…
Wayne
The tract made me think about all the people who have seen the church and rejected it. They were gone before they saw Jesus. I wept for a few minutes. Today i came back to post. My heart is so sad.
The tract made me think about all the people who have seen the church and rejected it. They were gone before they saw Jesus. I wept for a few minutes. Today i came back to post. My heart is so sad.
Wayne,
Apology accepted. Thanks for the explanation.
Wayne,
Apology accepted. Thanks for the explanation.
Now that I picked myself up off the floor and dried my eyes, I know a couple of churches that that would be a perfect tract on the table by the door.
sit close to the front
and
volunteer for everything else…
I am so glad that the Lord lead me to “so you don’t want to go to church any more” I’ve been out of the system for about a year and a half now and it’s been hard, but He is faithful over and over again.
Now that I picked myself up off the floor and dried my eyes, I know a couple of churches that that would be a perfect tract on the table by the door.
sit close to the front
and
volunteer for everything else…
I am so glad that the Lord lead me to “so you don’t want to go to church any more” I’ve been out of the system for about a year and a half now and it’s been hard, but He is faithful over and over again.
This is brilliant. As it happens, I was talking with a friend today who is in exactly this sort of church, is slowly being unplugged and waking up to discover what life can be like outside the matrix.
We live in Germany. We’ve been detoxing for about a year now, but the Lord hasn’t told us to leave the trad. church we’re in (although we’d love to) but to love the folks in there and die to the vision. It is SOOOOO painful. Like being in prison. There may come a day when we’re released, but in the meantime, we’re to walk in the freedom He’s given us, even though physically we’re still in shackles.
We just have to keep praising Him, no matter what happens; who knows – maybe there’ll be an earthquake and some will get saved out of it.
Love your site.
This is brilliant. As it happens, I was talking with a friend today who is in exactly this sort of church, is slowly being unplugged and waking up to discover what life can be like outside the matrix.
We live in Germany. We’ve been detoxing for about a year now, but the Lord hasn’t told us to leave the trad. church we’re in (although we’d love to) but to love the folks in there and die to the vision. It is SOOOOO painful. Like being in prison. There may come a day when we’re released, but in the meantime, we’re to walk in the freedom He’s given us, even though physically we’re still in shackles.
We just have to keep praising Him, no matter what happens; who knows – maybe there’ll be an earthquake and some will get saved out of it.
Love your site.