The Way: Getting Along With Others

Here are some more thoughts that have touched us from The Way by E. Stanley Jones. If you want some backgound on this book, please see my earlier blog about it.

I found this especially applicable to some of the thoughts and conversations I’m having about community these days:

People cannot get along with each other because they cannot get along with themselves, and they cannot get along with themselves because they cannot get along with God.

Every relationship we have gets twisted because we have no idea who Father is and how he’s invited us to engage him. Most of our conformity-based attempts at community fail precisely for this reason. Just to manage people we need an endless set of rules and hierarchies to keep order. All the while the real problem goes unaddressed. Until people learn how to live deeply in God, they will undermine their own attempts at community. And trying to manage people who can’t get along with God will lead to repressive, obligation-based environments that provide only an illusion of community if people cooperate on the same task. But each will be trying to get what they want from the others, and when they are disappointed they will default to manipulating them. To guard against that, “leaders” set up rules to curtail the selfishness of others, freeing them to pursue their own.

That’s why I’m convinced that community is the connection God gives between those who are living loved. Because if Jones’ statement above is true, surely it’s corollary is as well: People who get along with God, will be at peace with themselves, and they will get along with others freely. They won’t need relationships to be managed because they’ll live in the glorious order that comes from loving others and preferring them above themselves. Such people will see guidelines and hierarchies as false substitutes for helping people really come to grips with who God is.

That’s why real community is not a goal we can achieve; it’s the fruit of people who are learning to live loved by the Father.

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The Way: Freedom

Sara and I recently started reading a new book together. It isn’t easy for us to find books that we both enjoy. We’re incredibly picky because we want something that’s fresh and new to our journey, but also has depth and challenges the way we already think. But a friend of mine recently sent me a copy of a book he edited that was originally written in 1946 by a missionary in India, E. Stanley Jones. It caught my attention because I had run across the name of this author in conversations with some of my older brothers on this journey. It seems Jones was a real encouragement to many of them.

So, Sara and I started reading The Way written by E. Stanley Jones, a missionary back in India during the middle part of the last century. It is a devotional, so it is broken into smaller, daily readings, but Sara and I have been covering two each day and then reflecting for a few moments on what he’s written. In this book he is contrasting the way that Jesus taught us to live with what is not-the-way, that lures us into sin and frustration. We are enjoying it and gleaning some wonderful insights, all the more because it’s written by someone who lived many years before us.

So I’m going to share some occasional excerpts in future blogs because I think you’ll find them helpful, too, and because I find a lot of his insights so fresh and compelling. Like this one about freedom:

              Apparently we are free to choose, but we are not free to choose the results of our choosing.

Let that sink in. What a great statement on freedom! Though God has given us the freedom to make choices, he has not given us the ability to control the consequences of those choices. That’s what many people miss. In the name of freedom in Christ they are still making choices that cause incredible destruction in them and disruption in people around them. Though God designed the creation so we can do pretty much anything we want, we cannot escape the consequences of those choices. Our own independence and selfishness came not only come back to haunt us in ways we’d never imagine, but also can do great damage to the people around us even if that’s not what we intended. True freedom isn’t doing whatever we want; it’s the freedom to choose his way above the moral chaos of this broken world.

To do that we have to abandon the mistaken idea that righteousness is the onerous burden God has placed on us to keep an offended deity at bay. His desire for us to be holy is not to obligate us to do things the way he wants, but to invite us live in harmony with God’s reality in the universe. That’s why Jesus told his disciples that he wanted “his joy to be in them so that they joy might be full.”

Jones continues:

          (Jesus) is not imposing on us a foreign joy, trying to make us happy about something we dislike. He is giving a joy which, when we take it, is our very own… We must get hold of this until it becomes an axiom: My will and God’s will are not adversaries. The idea that God’s will always lies along the lines of the disagreeable is false. The will of God is always our highest interest. It could not be otherwise and God be God. I am fulfilled when I make Him my center. I am frustrated when I make myself the center.

That’s not because God has an ego so large that he has to be the center of everything. It’s just our growing awareness that he actually is the center of everything and true life is found in our coming to love, trust and rest in him.

And we even need his help to do that, because we are so easily swayed to do what we think best. Only when his love working in us is more real to us than what we think we can do by our own efforts, can we taste of the freedom that really is freedom!

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On the Road Again

After having four uninterrupted months at home with friends and family, it looks like its time to hit the road again, and perhaps the airport. Sara has recovered well from her surgery and though I’m not going whole-hog into an extensive travel schedule, there are some invitations that I felt led to accept and some personal conversations God wanted me to have as part of my journey at the moment.

So in a couple of weeks, I’ll be heading to Edmond, OK and then on to Tulsa. I’ll be doing a number of meetings in Edmond on Friday and Saturday, March 1 and 2. During the afternoons from 1:30 to 4:30 I’ll be at Conversations in Edmond for some open conversations about living loved. In the evenings from 6:30 to 9:00 I’m going to do a brief seminar about “Awakening to the Father’s Work In Your Life” to help people recognize the way God invites them into fuller expressions of his life. Space is limited, so you need to contact Conversations at their website if you’d like to join us there.

And then I’ll be heading up to Tulsa on Sunday morning and we’ll have an open time of conversation in Broken Arrow on Sunday afternoon from 2:30 – 6:30. If you’d like to be part of that you’ll need to contact Shannan.

You can find the necessary information and contact details on my Travel Page.

After that I’ll head to Australia in mid-April for some time Brisbane, Kingaroy, Toowoomba, Melbourne, and Traralgon. Details are on the travel page as well.

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Engage: Letting God Build a Relationship With You

A video and audio series desinged equip and encourage people to explore their own relationship with God. Unfortunately, many people who want to know God default to religious ways of trying to connect with him, but get discouraged when those attempts don’t work. I realize that a video series is not the ideal way to do this and that it would be far better to have the love and conversation of an older brother or sister near them who is enjoying the journey and willing to help others do so as well without loading them down with a bunch of religious rules and rituals. But for those who don’t know anyone like that it was on my heart to offer these short video encouragements to help others on a relational journey of knowing God. My hope is that it would also provide an example for others who want to help people on this journey but haven’t known how to do it.

For all the videos and audio, check our Engage pages

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