Wayne Jacobsen

A Week at the Mall Part II

My dad, son and I have spent four days touring Washington DC and having a meaningful and hilarious time together. I’m traveling with some folks that have wonderful sense of humor. We have been all over downtown DC and to the monuments, museums and memorials. Today we visited the new Air and Space Annex near Dulles and toured Mount Vernon. We were at the World War II Memorial on Tuesday and I found it moving indeed. We even met Senator Bob Dole there after a brief press conference he did. My dad got to shake his hand and that was special for him.

Some critics have panned the memorial as not being as moving as more recent memorials such as the Vietnam War Memorial. But the memorial does not have meaning because of its architecture but because of the sacrifice it memorializes. In other words it is not the memorial that qualifies the sacrifice, but the sacrifice that qualifies the memorial. It’s the same with our life in God. Like refrigerator art from our young children, it is not the quality of art that determines the worth of the artist, but our love for the artist that qualifies their work of art.

Tomorrow we go back downtown for the dedication of the Memorial. There has been a lot of talk about a possible terrorist incident associated with this weekend. It is interesting that it has not dampened the spirit or interest of the proceedings here as far as the veterans are concerned. We seem them everywhere and there is an instant camaraderie among as they pass each other on the street. These are men and women who already stared death in the face in their youth and they are not about to let the threat of terrorist activity rob them of the freedom they already sacrificed to gain.

I obviously don’t know what will happen tomorrow, but I also think the media gives us a distorted since of proportion about these dangers because it sensationalizes their news story. I am greatly looking forward to spending this day with my dad and son, as a grateful nation acknowledges the sacrifice these men and women made to conquer an unspeakable evil that sought to overrun the world.

What they faced, endured and overcome has been an incredible heritage for the rest of us. Only a fourth of those who fought in the war are still alive today and 1000 of them are dying every day. A tribute for their sacrifice is long overdue. I’m blessed indeed that God allowed us to experience this week together.

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Finding it All in Father

These verses are a feast aren’t they?

 

“His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.” 2 Peter 1:3-4

When we’re feeling a bit lost and confused, how often do we run to another brother or sister, browse the Internet or try to find a book that will give us the answer we seek. Here Peter points believers another direction. You have already been given everything you will ever need to live fully in him and participate in his nature.

It’s in Him and he is in you. As we grow to know him, we’ll also sort out the things that concern us most. Maybe why the answer is so hard to find is because we’re looking in all the wrong places. I think we’d all be less confused and more at peace if we sought him who holds all the answers.

Yes, he’ll often use others to affirm what he is doing in us. He loves connecting his family together. But that connection only flows from the Father of the family himself. Always go first to him. Steal away to your quiet place and drench yourself in his presence. Listen to him first for everything you need resides in him. Let his promises wash over you, because in them you’ll find his glory and goodness that will shape you exactly the way God made you to be.

I’m convinced that if we go there first we won’t be so confused by the multiplicity of voices we hear pointing us different direction. His knowing in us will be clear—”go that way!”

 

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A Week At the Mall

On Monday I leave for a very special trip. My father, son and I are flying to Washington DC to tour the city and to attend the dedication of the World War II Memorial, , on the National Mall next Saturday. I have been looking forward to this for a long time, not only to have some special time with my dad and son, and to celebrate my father’s life and his sacrifice in that great conflict.

Fresh out of high school my father enlisted in the infantry to help liberate Europe from the death grip of a madman. He was wounded in a vineyard in northeast just before New Year’s Day, 1945. That experience changed my dad’s life and I have feasted on the fruits of it my entire life. A few years ago he told a story to my wife and daughter that explains so much of his life.

In the middle of that conflict, enduring the bitter elements and trauma of war my dad had a conversation with God. “If you get me out of this conflict alive, I will never complain about anything as long as I live.” It wasn’t so much a vow to barter his way out of trouble, as it was a statement of fact. Dad knew that he would never experience any worse circumstances in his life than he faced there.

Over the years I watched my dad (at right) lose two raisin harvests, his only source of income, to unseasonable rainstorms. I heard others mock and vilify him for leaving congregations that had spiraled into more self than Spirit. I’ve prayed alongside him for people captured in the deepest bondages and watched him care for my oldest brother as he battled Multiple Sclerosis, and even endured his passing. He has been married for more than 50 years and I have never once heard my dad complain about anything, which is remarkable since I grew up complaining about everything.

In times of crisis and challenge I have seen him lean into Jesus with a gentleness and confidence that has held him through his entire life. He has been my father not only of the flesh, but also of the spirit as his example has inspired me to seek the reality and freedom of life in Jesus and never to settle for anything less.

Over the course of the next week I’ll be celebrating him and the best of what America has offered the world. I’ll tour our national museums and historic sites. I’ll attend patriotic ceremonies where I know I’ll be touched by the incredible ideals that have marked the American experiment. While I don’t see American as a ‘Christian Nation’, I do think on balance she has been a force for good in the world and here best ideals of liberty and justice for all are derived from God’s heart. Though our performance on these issues has always been flawed, there have always been men and women calling us to our best. And I will continue to pray for our leaders and be grateful for the men and women who have sacrificed their lives around the world in the name of freedom.

That may come as a surprise to those of you who took offense to my column on the perceived arrogance of the current administration’s rhetoric and foreign policy. Some of you seemed only to prove my point the harder you tried to rebut it. Our expressions of superiority undermine our moral credibility. To talk about how we’re being perceived in the world by our friends is not a judgment against President Bush’s Christianity, but to pray it transforms him even more. It is perhaps asking too much, but I want anyone who claims Christ’s name to also bear his character to the world and think that will go a long ways to accomplish the things President Bush says he wants.

So this week will be filled with joy and celebration as three generations of Jacobsen’s tour DC and join 100s of thousands of people on the Mall next Saturday. I see no problem giving thanks to Jesus for the incredible things he has done in our nation, at the same time I pray for her weaknesses. I do no less for my own life…

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Rejection from Others II

My last blog on rejection initiated an email contact with a sister half way around the world. She’s recently walked away from a religious institution because it seemed to her to be abusive.

 

My big fear is that perhaps they’re right. What if they’re right? What if I’m falling away from God? What if what they say is true – I’m unhappy in church because I’m the problem?

But I can’t fix myself. Don’t know how. Don’t even know where to start.

I mean, if my two best friends and my church leaders are all criticizing me the same way, are they right?

Does my passion scare them so much? Shouldn’t they be happier for me?

I just don’t get it, Wayne. All I want to do is to know God better. I want to break free from the prison I’ve found myself in. I want to question how things are done. Why must they come over and call me names? This journey made me love GOd more. It made me disillusioned with the church, which is good, since it was my crutch before.

Now all I have is Him. And I feel safer now.

 

Here’s how I responded:

 

I know what you’re going through at least a bit because I went through it myself 10 years ago. It is so hard when close friends suddenly regard you as an outsider. My heart goes out to you. I remember the questions of self-doubt very well. If the two brothers I had worked with closest in ministry now regarded me as unfit for the kingdom, what does that say about me?
 
I don’t think decisions like this are made, however, with trying to figure out who is right and who is wrong. When I stepped away from an abusive environment I wrestled with that also. But I think it is a false question. If I have to decide I’m more wise or closer to Jesus than someone else to step away, I’d never do it. What I found myself saying to God was, “I don’t know who is right or wrong here, but I have to follow my heart. If I am being selfish and independent, then let me be seen for that. If, however, I am following you, let that be known as well.” That gave me the freedom to follow my heart as he drew me closer to himself. I have never regretted it.
 
Time will let the truth be known and if you’re free to admit you’re wrong if that becomes true, then you don’t need to second-guess yourself every waking moment. I think we go on this journey by having the freedom to follow our heart, even if we might make a mistake. True friends will celebrate that with us. Those who just want to use us for their agendas, will be threatened by it. They’ll argue, “Who are you to disagree with us?” But that’s not how God works. That’s why you feel safer following him than pleasing others around you.
 
It can be lonely at times, though. It took me a couple of years to de-tox from religion—seeking the approval of others, feeling guilty for not doing what others demanded and finding my purpose in fulfilling institutional obligations. Through that whole time, however, God just kept making himself clearer and clearer to me. I think you’re already finding that to be true.
 
You’ll also find disillusionment to be a wonderful thing. It means we have illusions about God or about his body that God wants to ‘dis’ so that we could see him as he really is and his body as she really is in the world. In time you will know these are great days to have behind you, because the freedom they will produce in the long haul is truly amazing!

 

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Dealing with Rejection from Others

   I had a great time in Washington State last weekend. I spent my entire time west of Puget Sound on the Olympic Peninsula, some of it in Port Orchard and some of it around Port Angeles. A few of us even took an afternoon hike on Saturday through the rain forest to the falls pictured at left. We gathered every night and often talked through the day with people on various stages of the journey—many of them wanting a greater reality in Jesus and a richer body life with others.

 

We talked about so many things, from helping people get focused on Jesus instead of various ‘church’ models to encouraging people to walk in his freedom rather than the expectations and demands of even well-meaning Christians around them who think our dependence is on an institution rather than on Christ. Some people really struggled with things we shared, others embraced them with open hearts knowing that we were only giving voice to things God was already teaching them. I love when that happens.

As I was reading in I Peter 4 this morning in The Message I came across some passages that speak to that directly. Unfortunately we normally only apply them to people in the world:

 

Of course, your old friends don’t understand why you don’t join in with the old gang anymore. But you don’t have to give an account to them. They’re the ones who will be called on the carpet—and before God himself.
 

Then further down that chapter:

 

If you’re abused because of Christ, count yourself fortunate. It’s the Spirit of God and his glory in you that brought you to the notice of others. If they are on you because you broke the law or disturbed the peace, that’s a different matter. But if it’s because you’re a Christian, don’t give it a second thought.

 

It’s easy to see these passages as only applicable to those caught up in the rebellious ways of the world, but Jesus also lived this out with people who were caught up in the demanding ways of religion. When the religionists of his day chided him for not fitting into their ways or respecting their authority, he was not swayed. He followed his Father’s voice rather than the jealous cries of his threatened countrymen. One of the hardest hurdles for any of us schooled in religion to get past is no longer to seek the approval of others. People caught up in religion use approval to manipulate people. If you conform to their ways they shower acceptance on you. But if you don’t they heap blame and accusations on you hoping to scare you back into the fold.

 

Peter wanted his readers to remember that it is God that we and our detractors give account to, not each other. If we are following him we will no longer be manipulated by those voices that seek to lure us back into religious obligation or reject our spirituality because it doesn’t conform to their expectations. I love Peter’s reminder in that as well. If you’re suffering the rejection of others because you’re following Christ, then consider yourself fortunate. If, however, you are rejected because you are arrogant, bitter or destructive, then that’s a different matter entirely. Don’t glory in the trouble caused by self, but that which is caused by your life in Jesus and that rejection will only become another tool in his hands to make you more like him.

 

I know how scary and painful it can be to risk friendships like that, but it is the only way to follow him and in the end you’ll also get to find out who your true friends really are. Real friends will support your passion for Jesus even if they don’t understand the way he’s leading you. To live in his fullness we have to follow him instead of playing to the crowd—whether that’s those caught up in the world, or those held captive by religion.

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Arrogant America?

I don’t often comment on political events in this forum, but there’s something I’ve noticed in my recent travels that has disturbed me deeply. Admittedly my experiences overseas are limited, but I have noticed a significant shift in how America is perceived overseas, and this from believers among our closest allies. Where I used to hear warm appreciation for what America stood for and passionate support for our struggle against terrorism, I now hear the suspicion that we care only for ourselves and will walk over anyone to get what we want.

It’s almost embarrassing to travel as an American in the world these days. Our foreign policy in the last few years has conveyed an arrogance that alienates even our friends.
President Bush ran for office promising a new humility in American foreign policy. “Let us not dominate others with our power,” he said in 1999. “Let us have an American foreign policy that reflects American character — the modesty of true strength, the humility of real greatness. This will be the spirit of my administration.” During the October 200 debate he said the US was attemptiong too much abroad. “If we are an arrogant nation, they will resent us. If we’re a humble nation but strong, they’ll welcome us.”

The campaign rhetoric said he got that but his actions since have demonstrated that he does not. His policies only foster American self-interest without taking into consideration the needs and desires of other nations. Watch the language he uses to communicate with other countries. He talks down to them as a parent would scold a wayward child and in doing so only fosters resentment instead of cooperation.

When you can drop a cruise missile on a specific desk, through a specific window on a specific floor of a high-rise, you do not have to bluster your way around the world. There is no longer an evil empire to play good cop against and if we don’t walk wisely and humbly before the rest of the world we could easily become the common enemy as the last bully on the block.

Even though I receive countless emails from the latest Christian author or singer to come out the Oval Office professing how humble a man our president is, I no longer believe it. I used to chalk it up to his Texas bravado but am now convinced that our President cannot speak humbly before the world, because he really thinks our society superior, he believes our interests are the only ones that matter, and he despises those who don’t see things his way.

It appears now that President Bush’s commitment to war in Iraq was based on faulty intelligence. When we were being told to trust this administration because they knew more than they could tell us, it turns out they knew even less than they let on. Here’s where a bit of owning up would go a long way to dispel the notion of arrogance. But instead of admitting our mistake, he continues to defend it and even speaks about freeing Iraq with an evangelistic zeal, citing America’s divine mission to spread freedom throughout the world. It is scary if not also a bit oxymoronic to think of spreading freedom by military conquest. You cannot force people to embrace freedom and cannot give it to people who will not take it for themselves. The quest for freedom must rise from within a culture. When our founding fathers drafted the Declaration of Independence they put their very lives and fortunes on the line to gain what no one else could give them.

If countries in the Islamic world find freedom it’s because the progressive elements within in them will rise up and reject the tyranny of violence, brutality and control that keep them captive. They will speak out clearly and loudly even at great personal risk and only then will they know freedom from the terrorists and clerics that hold them captive. That said, we now have a great responsibility to support our troops in the most difficult of circumstances and do all we can to rebuild Iraq into a functioning society, if that is possible. We have to recognize that military power alone will never win this war if our rhetoric and policies only encourage others to take the place of those terrorists we kill or capture. For that we need the help of other nations around the world and to do that we’ll have to treat them as partners not as children.

If more Americans traveled abroad we might recognize our own arrogance better. Even as I write this I know many of my American friends will not appreciate what I’m writing (though I meet an increasing number who are uncomfortable with Bush’s language) and those overseas will. Americans are too often the loudest voices in the airports and talk to people of other nations as if we are experts on everything. We still measure temperature by Fahrenheit when everyone else uses Celsius and we are the only nation that hosts ‘World Championships’ without inviting the rest of the world to compete. We consume way too much of the world’s resources and only demonstrate greater greed for more. Even the entertainment we export glorifies our decadence in the name of profit. And sadly our culture treats the loss of American life as more tragic than the loss of any other.

In the minds of others these things are starting to outweigh our generosity that has helped suffering people the world over, our courage that has put our young men and women in harm’s way to rescue others from invasion and our creativity that has provided technology and resources for the world. If we don’t learn how to bend over backwards to play fairly alongside the other nations of the earth we cannot blame them if they join together against us as the mighty Goliath that needs to be knocked down a peg.

Humility is not weaknesses. The term is derived from the concept of controlled strength and pictures a warhorse at rest. Only the insecure and fearful have to boast and bluster. Those who are truly strong and confident can sit at ease until that strength is needed. They can act with resolve, but also compassion, earning people’s respect instead of their disdain. The war on terror will never be won by military might alone if we don’t also disarm the desperation and anger that feeds their army.

It is time for us to do some deep soul-searching in America sort out how we are being perceived in the world. If we cannot fund a more humble and gracious voice to the rest of the world we’ll find ourselves increasingly isolated. No matter what our military power can accomplish it will only succeed in further alienating our friends and inspiring further hatred in our enemies.

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The One Who Knows Me Best, Loves Me Most

Over the last few weeks I’ve found an old chorus running around my head. Part of it says,

I am loved, you are loved,
I can risk loving you.
For the one who knows me best,
Loves me most.

That last line has really caught my attention of late. The one who loves me the most knows the most about me. He knows every doubt I have, every failure I’ve made, every temptation I struggle with and every side-tracked journey I’ve taken. And yet, he loves me to the core of my being. He doesn’t define me by my weaknesses, but by that which he created me to be when I live in the freedom of his love.

The world sure didn’t teach us that. It taught us that to be liked we had to pretend to be someone we weren’t. We had to fit into people’s expectations or risk their rejection, which is why we go away from so many conversations regretting things we didn’t say or do because of what others might have thought of us. We’ve been convinced that people will only like us because they don’t really know us.

If we really knew that the one who knows us best loves us most, we’d be free to be ourselves around others. As with our Father, true fellowship only begins where people are free to be authentic, not when they pretend to be something they think others want them to be. We can finally stop projecting an image and let others see into our weaknesses and struggles instead of trying to hide them. Of course with people there is always risk in that. Some may not like us, but those that are real friends will and we’d find our relationships deepening with them because we’re not having to pretend any more.

Our security in Father’s love opens the door for us to simply and honestly before others, and that will do more than you can ever imagine in helping you taste of the kind of friendships God wants us all to know.

 

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BodyLife 2004 – The Shepherd’s Call

A new issue of our flagship publication, BodyLife, was posted on May 10, 2004. The lead article is entitled The Shepherd’s Call. Because this is a bit different, I’m creating this space on the blog for others to comment on the article. I’m not necessarily looking for a string of compliments here like, “Great article”. I’m looking for a place for people to interact with its content, whether positive or negative and I’ll join that conversation with my own thoughts when I can. Just hit the ‘feedback’ button to read other people’s comments or add your own.

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Simple Church Revisited

I got the following question as a follow up to my recent post on simple church and thought you’d be interested in the conversation that followed:

 

I’m likely confused by your latest blog entry but want to understand. There is something there that resonates with me. Are you saying that formal netowrking of house churches/simple churches (whatever you want to call them), might not be a good thing because it’s kind of man made? Are you suggesting that simple churches are ok as long as Jesus is the focus and the leader? I just want to make sure I understand your points. My wife and I are leading a house church/simple church (and) half of the the folks in our little community come from different “networks” the other half don’t. We are on our own and don’t allign ourselves with any “network”, but do obviously have freinds that also do the house church thing.

 

My response:

 

’m not saying formal netowrking is a negative thing so much as I’m saying it is an unnecessary thing. Enjoy whatever relationships God gives you both in local and more regional environments. He has a great way of allowing his people to intersect. I find formal networking, while exciting in its initial stages, will eventually create machinery that will need to be baby sat and may even limit relationships to those ‘in the network’ when God wants to connect you with other folks. I find the more we define our relationships institutionally the more doors it closes not opens. But I know many people who I love and respect profoundly who are involved in forming networks of simple churches. If that’s what they feel called to do, fine! I just think it is a detour that will siphon time and energy away from the real kinds of work God does.
 
I am also concerned that by forming networks and linking with other networks nationally, we are creating the same system that we all left. Sure it is in a different format, but eventually people will end up thinking more about the model than they do of following Christ. That has happened in institutional church, cell church, house church, and organic church and I have no reason to think it won’t happen with this as well. I wonder how much of this formal networking comes from our need for approval, to give our group some kind of credibility with other folks (or ourselves) by joining something larger. That’s how I’ve mostly heard it talked about by those involved in building them. It also helps carve out a vocational ministry job for someone, but in it they will probably end up doing far more managing and facilitating than they will discipling. Why do we need that extra overhead, when God is so amazing (even though things like the Internet) to connect people as he desires and having no formal relationship among them except to love each other and keep following Jesus as he leads us on?
 
Wherever Jesus is the center and focus of life, his church will emerge quite freely. As I said in the article, I’m all for simple church, especially if it is not capitalized as a thing, but recognized as a reality God is doing with a variety of expressions.

 

He responded:

 

Thanks. This does bring some focus to me on what you wrote. I agree with most of what you are saying. I guess my one concern is how we help train and equip leaders and future simple church leaders without some kind of structure. I’m sure I am just not thinking outside the box enough. Obviously, God will provide.

 

Me again:

 

I think leaders are less-trained by a structure, as they emerge among folks because of what God is doing in them. In other words their growth wouldn’t necessitate any equipping different than anyone else. Their responsiveness to Jesus and their insight into his ways would make room enough for them to help others as it becomes a reality in their own lives. Having structures that recognize certain leaders, often only identifies the wrong ones—those who are good at managing or entertaining people, not those who know Father’s heart.

Whenever structures try to train leaders, it rarely separates those truly called from those who have ambition in ministry. What we usually train them in the Bible, but unfortunately more emphasis is given on how to teach it to others, than to live the reality of its message and example. We also train them how to structure church according to a specific model, which does more to limit God’s working among his people than it does to release it, unfortunately. I hope I’m not being too cynical here, but if there is training going on other than those two in structured settings, I’ve not heard of it, but would love to.

That said, I think too little equipping is done in simple church environments. Instead of helping people learn how to live deeply in Christ, know the story of Scripture and how Jesus builds his body, we gather people in a room and hope ‘church’ happens. In many cases the event will be controlled by those who are willing to speak up or those trying to build a ministry rather than those led by the Spirit. I see a great need for people to learn how to live the life and to help others do so as well.

If not, people will end up as bored and empty from simple church as they were in more systemic forms.

 

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Back from Sacramento

I just returned yesterday from Sacramento after a five day trip to visit with believers in the area and encourage what God is doing in them. My son, Andrew, was able to go with me on this trip to check out a potential move to that area. What a weekend we had sharing God’s life together, meeting new friends and reconnecting with others who’ve been together before!

I spent most of my time in the Elk Grove area. A number of young couples and singles living in that area have found themselves spilling out of various religious institutions and are finding life together in various kinds of house church groupings. The fellowship they share together and the connections they maintain between groups has really encouraged them to live the journey. Many of these had been trained for vocational congregational leadership and been trained for it. Hungering for greater reality than they could find in the institutions they were a part of, they have risked so much to follow Jesus in more relational expressions of body life and other vocations.

On Sunday I spent some time with a large group from North Highlands which has been decentralizing their institution over the last five years and learning to live relationally in God and with each other. This was my fifth time among them and it is always fun to connect with such dear friends. I always look forward to reconnecting because I enjoy so much the journey they are on and the risks they’ve taken to follow the Lamb wherever he leads them.

We also had some others from the Bay Area and from the mountains above Sacramento come over to join us as well. Some of those people I’d corresponded with on the net and have talked to by phone but never met. (One of them is my blog guru who has taught me the joys of blogging. He and his wife are from South Africa and I had a great time getting to know them.) It is great to see God drawing people to himself in our day and the kind of hungers he has placed on their heart. For hours each day and often long into the night, we talked about how we shake free of religious thinking so that we can live freely in God’s life. I loved the hunger I saw for genuine relationship and the price they were willing to pay to find God’s life and freedom. It is so enriching to spend time with people who focused on growing in relationship with God and other believers and not trying to build an institution for themselves.

I want to thank each of them for opening their hearts so wide to my son and me and letting us peek in on their life for a few days. I have no doubt they are well in the master’s hands and that he is leading them spacious pastures and the cool, clean water of his refreshing.

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