Wayne Jacobsen

I got this question today by email from someone. There’s nothing that makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck more than this. But I have heard it taught a lot, especially by insecure men and women that are afraid of losing their supposed authority over people who are growing in freedom:

My pastor recently said at a leadership conference my husband attended that he, as the Pastor, hears from God more clearly than we do. Is that biblical? Is that true? It is frustrating because we are on this journey that is leading us to more freedom but we are confronted by people in our congregation that believe we are backsliders. It was said at this meeting that if you don’t serve in the church you are backsliding. It is hard. Hard to know what to believe anymore. Thanks for you words and podcasts. They mean a lot. If you could answer my question I would be grateful. You must be overwhelmed with questions.

Not only is the idea that pastors can hear more clearly from God untrue, but also no man of God would WANT it to be true. Jesus and the early church talked about from the ‘least to the greatest’ of them, ‘all will know me.’ Listening to God and following him is not what the mature folks get to do; it’s what he asked all of us to do. Those who lead don’t hear better, they help equip others to hear for themselves, because they would never want to see any person robbed from the delightful joy of learning how to listen and follow God. In fact a true leader will encourage you to follow him as best you know, even if you make a mistake, rather than follow what they think you should do.

Listen to these words from Matthew 23 in The Message:

“Don’t set people up as experts over your life, letting them tell you what to do. Save that authority for God; let him tell you what to do. No one else should carry the title of ‘Father’; you have only one Father, and he’s in heaven. And don’t let people maneuver you into taking charge of of them. There is only one Life-Leader for you and them—Christ.â€

This is a kingdom in which there are no experts to lord over others. Anyone who truly hears God will spend their lives helping others do so as well, not tearing away their confidence so that they will become more dependent on human leadership. That isn’t to say, of course, that there aren’t more mature brothers and sisters around us who can help us learn to follow him, and help us see when we’re missing God’s best for us by following our own desires, thinking they are God’s. But they wouldn’t dare say anything like you’ve written above. They are not interested in replacing God in your life, but helping you let God be your Father, friend and guide!

And, unfortunately, when you fail to conform to the religious standards of an institution, people will think you are backslidding. That doesn’t make it true. In fact, I think the more closely you follow him, the less you’ll fit into the religious constructs of the day, because they are meant to conform people, not to free them to life in him.

I’m sorry for the flack you’re getting, but this is just part of the journey. Keep loving them and loving him, but don’t think you have to conform to their expectations to love them. God has invited us to something so much better.

I got an email today from someone who is struggling to sort out what’s going on in the fellowship she’s been a part of for some time. Suddenly she’s finding that she doesn’t want to sit through all the meetings and finding them an “ugly weight†rather than a joy. But she feels guilty if she thinks about not going. She is realizing that although she goes in hopes of encountering God, it rarely happens there and yet she still has wonderful friends there.

It’s not an easy thing when God begins to open your eyes to the manipulation of religious systems. Suddenly participating seems like a chore, and you begin to see how the classes and designations designed to provide protection are actually manipulating people’s desires to belong and to be approved by others. Now it feels like a game and participating in it a bit “creepyâ€. What does she do?

Here are some excerpts from her emails: “That’s not to say that the pastor or others are horrible people – far from it. I love them and respect them. It’s just that I’m not comfortable spending from 10:30 to 12:45 there when all I really want to do is leave. It’s like my heart is changing as is my way of thinking. But adding to that is this sense of ‘well what would I do on Sunday anyway?’ I almost feel like I’m distancing myself from church as an institution and don’t know if that’s right or how to handle it….

“I’m frustrated and restless and honestly don’t know how to deal with much of what’s going on in my spiritual life lately. It’s like I can’t rest and that troubles me. I really hope you don’t mind me sort of tossing this your way. It’s just that you seem to be at a place where you actually do know rest and you’re not striving to be right or make a point.â€

Knowing her concerns reflect what so many others go through at this stage of the journey, I thought others with similar concerns would appreciate reading what I wrote back to her:

I can appreciate your story. Once you start seeing through the illusion of religion, it can be a scary road. All the things you’ve found comfort in before, suddenly seem destructive.

I love what you’re seeing, though I know it can be disorienting. It is the result of God answering your prayers to know him as he really is. As we get to know him, our perception of the things around us change, especially those things we’ve thought are his. I have no idea where this will lead you. Going to gather with other believers because they are your friends is never a bad reason to go. To see it as your place to meet Father is problematic, since he wants to be with you all the time. And seeing how you and others get manipulated by well-intentioned policies and programs will cause some grief.

Will God give you the grace to live through it and love folks anyway? Will God give you the grace to walk away and see what else he has for you? I don’t know. Only he does.

What you can do now is to stop responding to guilt. That’s the real power of religious thinking. It manipulates us with shame and with wanting others to approve of us, so that we’ll jump through its hoops. You don’t have to jump through those hoops to love God and love the folks there. But when you stop doing so, it may make you a bit more dangerous for the powers that be. The system cannot love what it cannot control and that may result in problems over time.

For now, just listen to Jesus. Do what he puts on your heart. Stop giving place to guilt so it can whither and die away and be gentle with those who cannot possibly grasp what you’re seeing now any more than you could a year ago. In that he will make the way clear ahead and you, too, will get to learn to live in his rest, and enjoy the incredible fellowship that the body can have together when it is less concerned about the success of the institution and more focused on who this Jesus really is…

I know that’s not very concrete, but he did not promise us concrete. He promised us life!

Thanks to the work of an avid reader and translator, Coen Groos, we are now able to offer PDF and Word versions of He Loves Me in Dutch! I hope you enjoy it.

And it looks like I may sneak over to Holland for a couple of days while I’m in the UK this summer toward the middle of June! I’ve never been there before and I’d love to meet so many people from there with whom I’ve been corresponding in recent years.

On Monday Sara and I got to spend the day with our daughter, son-in-law and of course our granddaughter Aimee on her first trip to Disneyland! That’s us on the left, except for Sara. She gets sick on the teacups, so she did the photography.

I have no idea what we’re talking about, but I seem to be the one doing the talking, which is not uncommon. At least the kids look interested, except for Aimee that is. She was anxious for the ride to begin. And she had a ball on that ride. We couldn’t spin it fast enough for her as she kept shrieking, “more spin” through her laughter.

I gotta be honest. There isn’t much about Disneyland that excites me anymore. I’ve been enough times that the magic is gone for me. It’s just a bunch of long lines and boring rides. We even waited twice in one line to ride Thunder Mountain Railroad, only to have the ride close twice just as we got to the head of the line because of some maintenance problem. Now, that’s a bummer! But to live it again through the eyes of my family, was a joy. Sara loves it. Julie loves it and Aimee really loves it! I rode some of the most boring rides in the world, but because it was with my family it was all special. I even rode Dumbo with little Aimee while the others were off riding something more fun. And I think I got the best end of that deal, even though we had to wait in line almost 40 minutes to jump on an elephant!

So on this day the relationships were far more important to me than any ride we were on. That’s the only thing that doesn’t get boring over time. I love hanging with my family and watching the delight of a little girl just discovering g-forces and flying rides for the first time. To her it was all magic and wonder, and she couldn’t get enough of it.

What’s amazing to me is I feel that way about my journey in Jesus every day. There is nothing boring about living my life out in him. Just being with him on any given day is life enough and joy enough. And I never know what’s coming next!

I have been way too busy since getting back from DC. Things have a way of piling up around here. Tomorrow I speak in Anaheim at the national convention of the Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development on “Sexual Orientation and Public Schools.” This is similar to what I did last week in DC, but without the panel. I deal with how schools can take sexual orientation harassment and discrimination seriously without undermining people of faith. It’s always a fun bit!

My wife, daughter, son-in-law and granddaughter are coming too! We’re hitting some of the Disney theme parks here on after my presentation and all day Monday. My family loves that place and it will be fun experiencing it through the eyes of a two year old.

Someone sent me an article last week that was written by Floyd Watson. I don’t know Floyd, I haven’t read his writings before, but I appreciated the last words of his last article. He actually finished two days before died. So the last paragraph he ever wrote was this:

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

Can you imagine summing up any better or more succinctly how Father asks us to live in this age?

What a way to go!

This feels like one of the longest trips of my life, just because of the ever-changing nature of the meetings I am into. I started over the weekend with some brothers and sisters from the Nashville area (and some that came in from further distances) sharing the life of Jesus together. Then it was off to Vanderbilt University for three days of sorting through church/state issues with a host of civil liberty groups, advocacy groups, lawyers and academics attempting to sort out such things as the Bible in public schools and evolution and intelligent design. I had some wonderful personal conversations as part of those days that were incredibly enriching.

Now I’ve moved on to Washington, DC and yesterday toured the Holocaust Museum (pictured at left) for a gut-wrenching, moving and eye-opening experience. We came away overwhelmed by what had happened, how easily an entire society was manipulated into such atrocity and the absolute devastation of so many lost lives. Unbelievable! And the exhibit touches some of your deepest emotions. Everyone on the planet would do well to live through that unspeakable time of our planet’s history and the reality of how one group of people could be so systematically targeted for torture and death.

Then last night we met with some networks of believers in the DC area that were most fascinating to say the least. I wish I could speak more about it here, but I just don’t have any idea what to say or how to process it yet. We went from one of the high-end office/restaurant areas of DC to a smoke-filled basement with half a dozen young men who were sharing a hookah as they were asking real questions about life in Jesus and how they could live it more authentically.

I’ll finish here this weekend with Friday night, Saturday and Sunday meetings with friends of Lifestream and The God Journey, and friends of those friends. I’m looking forward to seeing some folks I’ve met before and meeting new ones. And then on Saturday afternoon I’m doing a presentation as part of my BridgeBuilders portfolio to the leaders of 17 of the most influential government lobbying groups on public education about how we can deal with sexual orientation discrimination and harassment without undermining people of faith.

You just never know the places God will ask you to go. I treasure each of those environments and what he is doing in the midst of them, though so many coming at me in rapid succession, has worn me down pretty well. Today has afforded more rest and a chance to catch up on the office stuff that has built up.

As I spent some time in Matthew this morning, however, one phrase put perspective to so much of what I’m involved with during these days. I read the story of Jesus coming to the disciples in the midst of the storm as their boat is being swamped on the Sea of Galilee. Jesus has just endured the news of his cousin’s beheading by Herod, dealt wiht 5,000 people who wanted to hear from him and spent an all night session alone with his Father. The disciples saw Jesus coming to them over the waves and their hearts are struck with fear.

“It is I!” Jesus spoke to them, though they hardly believed it in their fear. I love that simple expression. Honestly it doesn’t matter to me where God asks me to go or who I might be asked to touch on any given day, as long as I can identify him and the work he is doing in those things. I may only have a hint of it, but when I hear, “This is I,” my heart comes to rest. It doesn’t matter if I’m stretched way beyond my comfort zone, or if the waves are crashing over the bow. It only matters that he is there and his purpose is unfolding in the way I live alongside him. Then, I really don’t mind being anywhere he wants me to be!

Thanks to all of you who have commented on our Shack covers. That’s still a work in progress and as you can see perspectives and tastes really differ on such things. That’s why they call it art, not science. Tomorrow I’m off to Nashville for the weekend and then will arrive in the DC area by midweek. This is a combination trip of some household gatherings to encourage brothers and sisters on this journey and some high-level BridgeBuilders work with some of the leading advocates of the civil liberties of public education. I’m also meeting with some people who may help us expose The Shack to some people who can help us find its audience. This will be a crazy trip! I’m really not sure I’ll have much time to post here, so I hope you’ll understand and if you think of it, please be in prayer for me and the folks I’ll be near over the next few days. I’d appreciate it very much.

And I thought I’d leave you with this incredibly encouraging email in seeing how Father works. I got this a few of weeks ago and thought you’d be encouraged by God’s work in this man’s life:

I’m presently re-reading your book He Loves Me and and listening to your Transition CDs on moving beyond religious thinking to relational living. The timing of these has come in the course of a journey that I would not wish on anyone but would not trade for the world. Four years ago I was given 3-9 months to live by the oncologist with a crippling form of bone cancer called multiple myeloma. As a pastor for 20+ years with many of the same issues that you’ve revealed in your material I’m finding your addressing the subject of shame, in the way that you are, to be the solvent that is untangling all the newly found truth I’m learning and experiencing together. Judging from something that is literally melting inside me, this is truly powerful. The reality and magnitude of things even now given our current circumstances for both my wife and I, (her deteriorating health I believe due to stress and deficient thinking regarding His love) is in a category that only the Lord can mange. But we both, through a better understanding of Him are realizing more of the life and rest He would have us to have.

I could go on and on about the pivotal moments when the Lord did exactly as you highlight—exceedingly abundantly—but I know you know these kinds of things. But I will share one. The best story being that at the age 45 and 44 for my wife, He brought our only child into our lives through adoption six months before I was diagnosed. I laid there almost completely bedridden for nearly another six months weeping trying to figure why a God would take a fatherless child and transfer him to another fatherless home. Little did I realize how a child would inspire, influence, motivate, encourage, us both in the desire to live. He truly is the God of love, life and hope.

Thanks again from the bottom of our hearts and beyond!

Over Christmas we attended a Sunday service where my parents worship. What could go wrong on a Christmas Eve service Right? Man it was ugly. The title of the service the, and I’m not kidding you here, “The Dark Side of Christmas”. I’ve never heard a hell fire and brimstone message on Christmas Eve before but I guess there is always a first time for everything. It was really sad to see that there was such a need to convince everyone that we were in the “wrath box” before extending grace. I couldn’t help but keep thinking about the quote from the youtube video on aids about extending grace before trashing with the condemning sin talk, yah I’m there. It was even replete with the famous Spurgeon quote “We are all standing on a plank over hell and the plank is rotten”, and I think he was thinking that it was a hot molten snowball free one at that. I couldn’t help think that I don’t think that I could serve a God like that and in fact I found my mind wandering down the thought line of if that is what God is like then I don’t want to be a part of it. I think that God has been doing some cool stuff in my life over the last 20 years or so, but those kind of sermons are trigger points for someone like myself who has been brought up in the more Fundamentalist fire breathing side of the God Camp,

There is quite a predominant movement afoot that is actually teaching pastors and others that we cannot extend grace to people until they feel the full weight of the law, their guilt and God’s wrath. How truly sad—as if sin isn’t its own worse punishment! What’s saddest to me is that these people have not yet found the treasure of life in Christ to be some compelling that God is worth loving for himself. He’s not just the better alternative to hell. He is the most incredible Father we could ever know, and he rescues us from sin, not bashes us with it. But they have no idea.

I honestly think we’ll see more of this as religion implodes from within. Not knowing how else to motivate people or keep the faithful contained, there will be more of this people-bashing with hell and wrath to try to keep what’s left in line. All of it breaks my heart.

For those following our development of a cover for The Shack, we have another incarnation to show you. If you’d care to comment, we’d sure appreciate your input.

I spent the weekend in the Sierras with a group of men sharing about the transformation afforded to us through the power of the cross. We had talked about performance based living, versus affection based, and how the law is fulfilled in us as we live a life of love, not as we try to fulfill the law. Live loved, and love! It IS as simple as that.

At the end of the session one of the men sat down next to me. “You know what I’m hearing you say about the law?” he asked.

“I think the law tells us how to treat people we don’t love.”

Isn’t that a great statement? And I think it’s truth goes beyond people. Here’s what to do if you don’t love God enough to walk with him as Father. Here’s what to do if you don’t love yourself enough to live in God’s truth and instead want to indulge our free appetites. Here’s what to do if you don’t love others enough to treat them fairly, respectfully, and kindly.

But if you discover the power of God’s kind of love the law is a cheap substitute indeed. It only shows you what MUST be done, not what you CAN do to love as we have been loved by God. I really like that definition of the law.

The problem is, until you discover the power of love, you’ll never be able to keep the law. It is not in us to do by our own self-effort! Thanks be to God for Jesus Christ and his work in us!